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Post by momofrussell on Feb 10, 2005 11:41:36 GMT -5
Hey Staci, don't assume they don't like you... and remember... you are NOT causing trouble... you are doing what is BEST for YOUR CHILD.. that is NOT causing trouble!!!! Causing trouble would imply you are lOOKING for something to be wrong... on the contrary, you are observing your child and realizing some changes could be made and that is a GOOD thing... THAT really is the teacher's job But, it seems she is sedintary and needs some assistance... via YOU! So quite saying you are causing trouble... get those words OUT of your mouth and mind!!!! Got it!? And they don't HAVE to like you LOL.. they just have to do a great job with your son!!!! Solving things nicely is, well, nice.. but not all things are solved with smiles... and if the smiles don't work and you need to get tough, then so be it. A.
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Post by YoshsMom on Feb 10, 2005 12:13:37 GMT -5
With younger kids I always tried to write something every day, even if it was just a line or two. If something particularly good of particularly bad happened I always shared it. I also wanted the parents to write back to me and let me know about things at home, some did and some didn't. Interestingly enough, the kids whose parents took the time to write back to me always seemed to make the most progress. And any parent that wanted to visit was always welcome, with a little advance warning. When I had older students who could speak for themselves (over 2nd grade) I called once a week becausae notes had a tendency to get lost One of the reasons I love doing early intervention is that I've got the parent right there every time.
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Post by Staci on Feb 10, 2005 13:29:53 GMT -5
Can I print all of your responses out and show them to his teacher? I swear, I want to just cry right now. I'm totally put out. Here's what happened..... NOTHING! Today was Aidan's Valentine's party, I went to it expecting to maybe merely "mention" the communication book and the letter I wrote...I wrote the teacher a letter and stuck it in Aidan's backpack (she didn't call me back yesterday, so I was bound to communicate somehow), told the aide a "bit" about what I was wanting to do, I like the aides, they're great...told her about the letter to the teacher, etc. My letter was VERY nice...and I mentioned one other thing that had been bugging me which was "snacks". Maybe I shouldn't have added about the snacks in there, but it was on my mind, and it was nothing major. I don't like the fact that all Aidan get at snack time is junk food...but I don't complain, all I'm asking for is that when they get a WHOLE candybar or a WHOLE huge rice krispie treat, to only give him half. That's all I said...because Aidan WILL eat it all since he just doesn't know when to stop and then gets home and won't eat a healthy lunch like I want him to...so the only thing his teacher said to me today, as the kids were eating their ice cream cup, chips, dip, pizza rolls, and cookies and candy (see what I mean??) she said "Is this too much for Aidan to eat, shall we put some in his bag??" like she was making fun or something....I just want to sit down and cry. I'm really tired already. Anyway...I told her to give me a call this afternoon or tomorrow, whenever she's not busy, so we could talk. I even told her if she would like for me to come to the school to talk, just let me know. So that's what happened today. I don't see that I did anything wrong...and I know I'm not out to "make friends" with these people, I am just learning to speak up and speak loud LOL...I just wish you all could come and whoop some butt with me! LOL J/K! We'll see what comes of this. Thanks for letting me vent. The reason they don't like me is because I DO challenge them when they haven't been challenged by a parent before...I don't know if you all remember my rant about what they did and said at the beginning of the year last year...they didn't even want him IN school, said he was too medically "fragile" (this is a early education type class seting we're talking about, half special needs, half model kids), I fought for him hard and got them some extra "help" (an extra aide) so they could "handle" Aidan at school. Augh! Ok...enough ranting. I'm done. Thanks for listening! Staci
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Post by Alice on Feb 10, 2005 13:52:15 GMT -5
OMG, I am so sorry for you and your little one. That "Teacher" doesn't want to do her job, she is probably at a wrong place and I am very sorry for all kids she is dealing with. Accualy she is wrong person for any school. Staci, do not spend your time and energy on that person - she will never change her attitude and she will never be a good teacher. Go and talk to her boss, ask to move your son to another teacher. Do you know if they have better teachers at that preschool? Hugs to you and good luck, Alice
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Post by momofrussell on Feb 10, 2005 14:44:25 GMT -5
Well, I think almost ANY parent would have a fit if the ONLY snacks given at school were sugary treats and nothing of redeaming food quality. Do they do those types of snacks EVERY day? Is there anything healthy given to these kids? Is this school part of the school system or a private preschool type thing? BECAUSE, the school districts HAVE TO HAVE TO supply healthy snacks!!!! There are guidelines that the schools have to follow for lunches and snacks... AND... if it's some private school, they STILL usually provide something healthier then a candy bar! I have never heard of such a thing unless it WAS a party type of thing.... Staci, someone needs to know that these children are not getting adequate snacks.. that is not healthy!!! Besides, nowadays, most school districts that did provide snacks don't anymore because of food allergies and liabilites... so I am REALLY shocked they are giving them food like that... they could really get in trouble if you ask me.
AND... you know what I would do, personally? I would start providing a bag with different snack things, crackers, gold fish, ect... and let them know this is what you want your son to have everyday because it's better for him. You can buy those items that have little bagged snacks in them so they don't over feed Aidan too. You can put a variety of things in it and then Aidan can feel independant and HE can pick out his snack every day! (this is what I do with Reece actually).
Oh.. and when she talks to you like that... just smile and glare at the same time LOL.. and fight those tears and if she brings up the food like that again, I'd say "Yeah, put the rest in his bag or give it to someone else who can afford some cavities and upset stomach!"
Gheesh girl... if we lived a bit closer I would LOVE to observe Aidan! Sounds like she is very set in her ways and you are challenging her and she needs that! Whether she likes it or not. And, if she does NOT respond to your letter and phone calls, document it all and then go talk to a spec ed facilitator or better yet, the principal. The principal NEEDS to know what is going on, whether he/she does anything about it or not... but first you go to the teacher, then, when all else fails, climb that ladder! I make it a point to make a relationship early in the year with all my kids principals, a friendship... so if I need them for something, it's not the first time they meet me. Regan's principal in 5th grade proved to be VERY valuable to certain situations I had with her teachers... which I ALWAYS went to. But when they were giving me grief, to the principal I went and I got things accomplished!
How bout for right now you put in some sheets of paper in his bag and ask one of the aides to start jotting down what he did in his day?! Just a thought... There is plenty of time in the day for the teacher and aides to write something to you and all the parents. Lunch break, potty break, down time.... there IS time if they make it!
Good luck... Let it out girl!!! And just stand your ground!
A.
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Post by christie on Feb 10, 2005 20:36:59 GMT -5
Awwww STACI, I can feel your frustration girl and believe me have been there with other issues myself over the years I AGREE with A~ put some paper or get a little note book in Aidan's backpack and ask the aide if she will communicate with you daily. Now let me ask you, do you have an IEP coming up anytime soon?? If so, I would request a communication book and say you want that in the IEP. IEP's can have lots of things added, doesn't have to just be goals and objectives I remember when Chris was in preschool, we were working very hard on getting him to stop Hugging everyone. The staff at the school were no help whatsoever I would always see someone hugging him and other parents would tell me they would see it lots too. So I actually requested that NO HUGGING, unless he was hurt, be put in his IEP as it was the only way I could get these adults to stop it. They were like BUT he is soooooo cute and just soooo HUGABLE Hmmmm I said to them, HEY do you go around hugging all the other children in the school?? No need for me to say more Now just my thoughts girl, BUT I wouldn't get sooooo wrapped up in worrying if they like you or not, I mean personally I could care less what they think. All that I care about is my son gets what he needs. Believe me girl, I kid you not, I am sure my district would throw me a party if we ever moved away and not because I am their favorite person, LOLOL BUT hey Chris is my favorite person and they need to do their job and if I need to remind them of that, so be it I always start out playing the nice nice game but in the end I will do what ever I have to for my guy. We even have filed for court in order to get what Chris needs, surely didn't go over big with my distrist BUT hey who cares Chris got what he needed, thats all that matter to me. Just one last thought, I would give the teach a few days to respond, Hmmm lets see today is Thrusday right?? K, if you hear nothing by say Monday then call her and request to meet on this very topic that she seems to be ignoring. Wishing you all the best and I may not be able to be with you personally BUT for sure in Spirit CC ~
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Post by Staci on Feb 10, 2005 23:50:36 GMT -5
Thanks for making me feel better, girls! You are awesome! It's a good idea sending snacks for Aidan myself...I used to last year when we thought he had Celiac's diease, I would provide his gluten free snacks. Ended up he didn't have Celiac's. I really didn't know what kind of snacks he was having at school...you know, since I DON'T get a report or anything (LOL) but parents have to provide snacks once or twice a semester...I always send goldfish or some kind of cracker...I didn't know what the other parents were sending. Well, not too long ago there was a letter stuck in Aidan's bag saying "the snacks are getting low again, if you haven't sent one in a while, please do so...the kids like cookies and chips the best"! So, I started asking the aides, when they would bring Aidan home, what he had for snack...sometimes it was crackers...several times it's been "oh, Aidan ate a HUGE candybar, he'll probably not be hungry for lunch!" LOL YEAH! So...anyway... You're right...the sugar highs need to be stopped. I don't allow Aidan to eat like that at home...he gets candy or a cookie sometimes...but certainly not every day. His dessert is applesauce or a fruit bowl, that's what my kids get...not that they don't LOVE the sugar! LOL I'm tired and rambling now! LOL Thanks for your help, your suggestions...and thanks for giving me my voice! I do let things slide sometimes...because I don't want to cause trouble...I feel like I've caused ENOUGH trouble as it is with the stuff that happened last year. I hate causing trouble...but when it comes to my kids, man...I can be a bear, I learned that about myself last time I had to throw a fit!
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Post by donnac on Feb 14, 2005 9:26:52 GMT -5
Staci --
I haven't read everything in all of the other replies, but I do want to pass along what worked for my son several years ago (I hope that I'm not repeating anyone else).
His teacher made a sheet (actually, she gave me the original and I made about 100 copies at my husbands office and placed them in a notebook) that told what he did during the day. The front side was school, and the back was home. It had pecs pictures on it, and they would have him circle the pictures that corresponded with his day. For example, if he had PE that day, he would circle PE, he would circle ate lunch and so on. On the home sheet it had items like watched TV, took a bath, played with toys, went outside, played on the computer, etc.
This type of sheet can be modified for anyone's schedule. His teacher worked it into her lesson plans so that he would mark his sheet at the end of the day. This helped with his fine motor skills because he had to open the marker and circle the items. He had to follow instructions by getting his notebook and opening it up, he had to choose his marker color,etc. Lots of little learning skills that are snuck in there. Each day we would talk about the sheet which helped greatly with his communication skills. The sheet that we sent back to school also gave the teacher an idea about what he did the previous evening which would sometime let her know that he had a busy evening and may be tired or out of sorts.
Maybe you could make something up and suggest that she use it. Well, then again, after reading your posts, it may not be all that easy. I would consider calling an IEP meeting and have the daily communication written into it.
Hope this helps. Donna
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Post by justinsmom on Feb 14, 2005 10:01:29 GMT -5
Donna that is a GREAT idea, hope you don't mind if I mention this to Justins' teacher. She is having a fit because she just can't find the right type of form for her daily notes she sends home, she wants to let us know everything they did or are doing in class but doesn't want to take time away from the kiddos while she fills out her note so this sounds AWESOME!!!!!! but have to say she has done a great job so far.
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Post by momofrussell on Feb 14, 2005 10:28:18 GMT -5
I will get one of Russell's sheets and scan it and show you guys what Russell's teacher uses....
A.
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Post by Staci on Feb 14, 2005 10:46:49 GMT -5
I just typed up a LONG post...then it dissapeared! Augh! Donna, that's a great idea! I was just wondering what kind of pictures you used, pictures that you took or did you find something from the net, etc? I was thinking how I could make something like this with Aidan's pictures...I'm sure Sean, my husband, can help me. Thanks for the great suggestion! A, I can't wait to see what you use for Russell...might give me some great ideas to steal from you AGAIN! LOL I bought a small notebook yesterday for Aidan's backpack....I filled out some fill in the blank and circle one answer type stuff...something simple for them to fill out. Like "did Aidan have a BM today, yes or no....Aidan played with ______ today at school...Aidan ate _____ for snack today" type of questions. I wrote a little about Aidan's weekend on the next page and left a space for teacher's comments, if any. I told the aide about the book, told her it would only take under a minute to fill out, but that this is important stuff that I need to know about Aidan's day. She didn't seem too pleased, but oh well, huh? I told her I would be calling his teacher AGAIN today and she said "don't call today, she'll be really busy today"....whatever...as long as I get my report. Anyway...you all have been super great! Thank you all sooooo mcuh! I really appreciate your suggestions and support! Staci
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Post by Alice on Feb 14, 2005 11:39:32 GMT -5
Staci, .... give her multiple chose or true/false questions. ;D LOL Sorry, just kidding (trying to make you feel better)! It seems to me so ridiculous to ask a teacher for the simple thing - communication. OMG, I would be very much upset and unhappy with that type of teacher. Hugs to you, Alice
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Post by Staci on Feb 14, 2005 15:45:28 GMT -5
LOL Alice! I know that must sound weird...fill in the blank, circle an answer...hey, it was A's suggestion! LOL You're right...it is really sad that I have had to do something like that to get some answers! Augh! So frustrating! I made that out last night in my little notebook...I guess his teacher, over the weekend, was busy filling out a 10 page, majorly detailed report for me. She just isn't getting it, you guys! I don't EXPECT a 10 page detailed report every day...every week. She put in her ten page report that she doesn't have time for this, then proceeded to give me a one page report on HER daily duties, every moment of the day! She bought Aidan a new backpack over the weekend, I guess...WHY? ?? His backpack is JUST FINE...and his backpack fits him...it's small because Aidan is small...why would she do that? I don't think it was to be nice...it's not like we can't afford a backpack for him...his was brand new at the beginning of the year! I think she was saying "with all of the CRAP we have to transport back and forth (glasses, diapers, PECS photo book, and now this new notebook) here's this HUGE thing so we can fit it all in....and it fit nicely this morning, no problems for me, don't know why it would be a problem for her!? Stick a fork in me...I'm DONE! I was curious if I COULD print out some of your responses and let her read what OTHER teachers are doing for our kids? She is obviously taking offence to ANYTHING I suggest...although, in her 10 page report, she said "I'm open to suggestions"....yeah right! So, I'm going to call a meeting...face to face...and hash this all out. She has overreacted like this before...I shouldn't be surprised! I am just tired of this...yes, she is being challenged by us when she probably hasn't been challenged by a parent before...she isn't liking it, that's for sure. I just don't know what to do anymore! So, if its ok with some of you (and if it isn't, PLEASE LET ME KNOW!) I'll print out some of your responses to SHOW her what other parents are GETTING! Thanks for letting me VENT! Staci
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Post by donnac on Feb 14, 2005 17:35:28 GMT -5
You can print anything that I post here to you.
I found some of Tyler's old sheets. His teacher (who is no longer at his school for me to ask) found the communication sheets that she used in a book. They are pecs like pictures that are 1 1/4 inches by 1 1/4 inches. The title is:
I Like Me! My Day At School
Today at school, I
(.....followed by the pictures)
At the bottom, it has
Special Notes: (and a space to write info in)
From: (and it is signed by whomever wrote the notes and assisted with the sheet)
The school pictures were, Read a Book, Went to Library, Used the Computer, Cooked, Did Puzzles, Played Outside, Played with Toys, Ate, Had Music, Had Art, Had PE. There was also a bland square that she filled in for things like PT, speech, math, etc. She also drew some more blanks off to the side and filled in as necessary.
The home sheet had Ate Dinner, Took a Bath, Read a Book, Cooked, Watched TV, Played Outside, Played with toys, Saw Friends, Used the Computer, Saw a Movie, Went Shopping.
I can try to scan them and e-mail them, but my scanner doesn't always cooperate.
Before she started the above sheets, she used another sheet as follows. This sheet only took minutes to fill out because she mostly used checkmarks. She would fill in the blanks for some items such as cut w/scissors for Fine Motor Skills, etc. Here goes, I hope its not too long. Donna
LOOK WHAT I DID TODAY!
Free Play ______I participated independently/with help ______I did not participate
Work Time ______Motor Skills_________________ ______Cognitive Skills______________ ______Communication Skills__________ ______Computer Skills______________
Circle Time Book_____________________________ Special Song/Fingerplay______________
Snack I had_____________________________ __I ate __I tasted __I put into mouth __I did not eat
Wrap-up ____Outside activity ____Inside activitity
Special Activities ____Speech Therapy ____Hearing Services ____OT ____PT ____Library ____Vision Services ____PE ____Extra Special_______________________
Notes From School _____________________________________ _____________________________________
Teacher/Assistant_______________________
Notes From Home (special activities, health issues, etc) _____________________________________ _____________________________________
Parent/Guardian________________________
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Post by donnac on Feb 14, 2005 17:42:24 GMT -5
I guess that I should have added that the Look What I Did Today sheets also stayed in a notebook that we sent back and forth daily. Each morning, she would make Tyler get the notebook from his bookbag and show her the sheet so that she could see the notes from home. He would then have to place the notebook in its place on her table for her to fill out at the end of the day. She would have the students place the notebook back into their bags to take home. This again teaches them to follow directions, use fine motor skills (to open the book, open and close the zipper on their bags). She used these sheets for all of the students in her room which usuall totally about 8 or so.
Tyler had this teacher for three years. We did have problems with her filling out the sheets during his last year in her classroom. The solution that the school district office gave me was to put it in his IEP.
Donna
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