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Post by violettesmom on Aug 4, 2007 15:55:38 GMT -5
Ok, this will probably sound crazy (especially knowing my dd is only 5 weeks old, lol), and I think I know the answer, but is it unreasonable to expect that someday Violette will have manners as nice as my older girls? I don't care if it is signed or spoken, but in our house you interrupt with the words, "Excuse me mommy, may I please..." and you leave the table with the works "may I please be excused daddy."
Believe me at a very young age with the older ones I've been very demanding about this. I feel like being polite should be an automatic skill for a child, and they should use polite words without even thinking about it. And I think it is a skill that lasts a lifetime and really sets a good impression with anyone one you meet.
Well, that's how I feel about my typical children anyway. Should I set a different expectation for Miss Violette?
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Post by kristin on Aug 4, 2007 17:06:34 GMT -5
Violette's mom ~ Not a silly question at all... You're smart to be thinking ahead! What I've found in this arena is that my child with DS is WAY MORE polite than my other kids! At 5 years old, Cole really thrives on routine and consistency, and I do mean thrives. He can repeat his bedtime schedule for anyone who's around at bedtime, expects the same routine during the day, etc., and not to a point where he's obsessive about it, but he definitely "cues" off of what he's done before. So, when he receives a drink or food, he automatically utters a "Fank-You"  for whatever he's gotten. When he "toots" or burps, he always says, "Mommy, I toot... Mommy 'scuse you", and we say, "Yes, Cole, you're excused. Thanks for your nice manners, Cole". So starting young will likely have really positive results!! That's just been our experience, and I have to say, I wish my other two were as "well-trained".  |
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Post by Chester on Aug 4, 2007 17:39:34 GMT -5
At our house everyone has the same rules, manners included.
Often JT has the best manners around. He doesn't waste a second to sign and say excuse me, sorry or please.
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Post by hannahph on Aug 4, 2007 17:52:19 GMT -5
It's not a silly question at all. Hannah is one of the most polite kids I know. She always says please and thank you and excuse me. It might take some time but if you are consistant and use polite language yourself , she will pick it up.You may not get the full sentences you are posted but definitely a version of them.
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Post by jessjetland on Aug 4, 2007 18:38:11 GMT -5
Sam always uses please and thank you. We expect it from him and our one year old is also signing thank you so I guess we have been doing something right.
Jess
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Post by violettesmom on Aug 4, 2007 18:42:24 GMT -5
Thanks so much! I'm fine with modifications, but it is important to me as much because I think it will help the older girls realize that the rules for Violette are the same as the rules for them.
I've always, at least during the morning and at night time, tried to follow really good routines. We put all of my school aged daughters clothing for the week in her closet including socks, underwear, etc. on Sunday. I create laminated routine charts I make up every year for morning and evening - they are step by step with pictures of what is expected of her. I'll use them and create them for my 2 year old, and Violette as well! Sounds like she may really like them!
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Post by Pat on Aug 4, 2007 20:06:33 GMT -5
John-John is polite please, thank you, welcome, even yes, sir. May be one day I get "Yes, maam"  LOL My kids have to ask to be excused to get down from the table. John-John was expected to do the same, so until he had the language he signed it. One day his teacher wanted him to say open, so she had the box & said "Open" he'd say "Please" & it continued like that ...she finally gave in LOLOL Pat |
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Post by CC on Aug 4, 2007 21:31:10 GMT -5
Christopher is 14 and has always and still continues to be most POLITE ;D He has always been very BIG on Thanks, Please, Excuse me LOL but the excuse me part YIKES he will continue to say it till you acknowledge him LOL He loves to open doors for others is always holding the elevator doors for ones to run in. He loves to introduce everyone, I really could could go on and on ... I have two kids and I am very happy to say both my kids are truly very very polite ;D Just my thoughts but I do believe kids do as they see what the parents do, KWIM?? NOPE not unreasonable at all, should be expected BTW NOOO ? is ever silly or crazy in my mind  CC ~ |
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Post by Pat on Aug 5, 2007 8:02:49 GMT -5
And believe me CC LOVES to ask questions Pat |
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Post by char on Aug 5, 2007 11:34:51 GMT -5
Abby has been in speech therapy for some time now. I understand that she signs and says please and thank you. She is now working on you're welcome. Abby's dad, my son, says yes ma'am and no ma'am when he's talking to me or anyone else so I expect he'll be setting a good example for Abby.
Abby seems to learn what her family knows and sets as examples. I bet Violette will be the same! By the way, Violette is my great granddaughter's name, and it's spelled the same way as your daughter's.
Char
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Post by difrompa on Aug 5, 2007 13:20:23 GMT -5
Absolutely. I (or rather Nic) gets compliments all the time about what good manners he has. He calls men "sir", say's "excuse me "(at appropriate times), apologizes and says "will you forgive me?", etc., etc., etc. His teacher gave him an award at the end of the year for having the best manners. Just start teaching the manners early.
BTW, he's 10 years old but we started teaching him at 2 or 3.
Di
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Post by Jodi on Aug 5, 2007 17:55:29 GMT -5
We try to have the same expectations for Ryan as we do for his older brother. There are some areas where this doesn't work, but for the most part it does. Ryan says, "please, thank-you, I'm sorry" etc... most of the time voluntary now. We still prompt him if he forgets.
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Post by chasesmom on Aug 5, 2007 23:42:57 GMT -5
Chase has better manners than all three of his "typically normal" brothers combined! He has had those manners sice he was old enough to utter one word sentences!!! Fear not Ms Violette will be a perfect little lady!!!!!  hugs, Robin |
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Post by MB on Aug 6, 2007 0:02:58 GMT -5
She will have wonderful manners if you insist she have wonderful manners. Not to worry. We would love to hear more about your beautiful daughter.
And......there are no stupid questions at UnoMas.
mb
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Post by mollysmomma on Aug 6, 2007 17:59:40 GMT -5
only one of her chromosomes is affected...the other ones are allllllllllllll you and dad! and she will follow suit on those genes! And if everyone is polite?? She will be also...like any child, she is going to mimic everything she sees.
Count your blessings with that polite family!! Molly's first years were spent with a retired-sports-loving state trooper...and two teenage boys!! HOW she got polite??? that's beyond me!! I DO know where some of her language comes from!!!! *grin*
Molly is 7 now, and one of the things im MOST grateful for...is how appropriate she is!
If we're on the plane...she watches everyone, and just does what they do....sits down, shuts the shade, pulls down her tray, and signals for peanuts!
I saw her at school taking the class pic...all the little girls folded their hands in their lap, and so she did too! She's very observant, and for whatever reason...really has learned how to follow the lead of the pack.
She says please and thank you in public....
She knows what 'wait your turn' means, and follows all the rules at school!
Your little darling is going to be everything you dreamed of and MORE! promise!!
i have found in these rooms if it hasnt been asked before...it NEEDS TO BE!! Any question is one someone else will ALSO learn from!!
Besides...all of us with these enhance children still remember the uncertainty that comes in the first few months....the questions...the fears...the tears...the relief in finally getting to see her! Been there, done that.....and will ALWAYS hold those moments dear to my heart. You are among friends.
:-)
kiss that little neck for me...I LOVE BABIESSSSSSSSSSSS!!
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for whatever he's gotten. When he "toots" or burps, he always says, "Mommy, I toot... Mommy 'scuse you", and we say, "Yes, Cole, you're excused. Thanks for your nice manners, Cole". 
LOL
