Will my child ever talk?

[jessjetland]

Hi everyone,

Sam will be 6 here in June and it feels like he will never talk. He says very few words and does alot of signing I just wish he could tell me whats going on in that head of his. Its so hard right now because his little brother is going to be 2 and he talks up a storm, I just want to have a conversation with Sam. He is the most loving and affectionate child I know but it would be so wonderful to hear mom come out of his mouth or an I love you. I tell my friends that Noah is so chatty and they say typical things like wait until he doesn't shut up and I know that I will never take it for granted. This is something that I want for him so bad its frustrating.
Thanks for hearing me vent.
Jess

[Chris too]

(((hugs))) to you. I'm sure it is frustrating. At times like these, it helps me to count my blessings. Sam seems to be making progress, right? Even though Noah is so chatty, there are kids that never speak at all - but that's not Sam. You said that Sam "says very few words" - that's talking, isn't it? He signs, so he can carry on a conversation of sorts. Try to enjoy these little things while you're waiting for the "Mom" & the "I love you" that you are longing to hear.

[Chris]

Jess,

Speech is the area that Sarah struggles the most. She tries so hard but her progress is slow. She turned six last September and is finally starting to actually use her words. She was getting pretty good at naming things but didn't really use her words conversationally.

You are so blessed to have a great little language model living in the same house as Sam. I'm sure Noah is teaching him more than you can see.

I think the Signing Time dvds are wonderful motivators. I really credit them for teaching Sarah to be verbal as well as sign. I like the fact that they speak when they sign. They are a fabulous teaching tool and well worth the investment.

Chris

[jelanismom]

Jess, here I am reading your post and thinking the same way about my son, he's 5 and will be 6 in November....it's been this way for me since he started school 2 1/2 years ago, I wonder what he's thinking, I ask him about his day when he's home from school, I give him options of what he wants for dinner, but he gives no response. I hold up two shirts "ok which do you want to wear today?" I expect him to point, sometimes he does. I hold up two lunch items, two books, two whatever, and I see his eyes and how he wants to tell me and I feel so helpless sometimes. I can't tell you how many times every day I feel this way...when will he use his words? I want to have a mom and son conversation and there's days that I ask him something and he says something I can't understand and I just nod my head and agree, just trying to make him "think" I understand, so as not to make him feel misunderstood. I'm in your shoes. This is so difficult, because we have to be so strong and patient, but the words WILL come.

And eventually we'll both be posting ..."Why can't I get my son to stop talking up a storm?"!!!!

[sandi]

Well I must say, I am learning a lot from this group. Things that I may expect as Cassie grows up.

[momofrussell]

HUGS to you!! I think a few words and signing is a great start! I know it is frusterating... I have one that has never spoken ANY words and signing is shoddy at best... we have to prompt it.

If your child is using signs and can initiate communcation that way.... I'd continue facilitating communication that way. Maybe you can expand on the words/signs he knows to encourage feelings, thoughts, etc.... you could take a sign class even?! Sometimes we need to follow the child's lead for a bit.. I am sure with all the signing the words will come sooner or later...but you might as well use the signs!

Good luck!

[victoriasdad]

victoria talks up a storm, but it is mostly gibberish, not to her of course,
she is seven now and starting sentences, it was fustrating for me she said perfectly daddy i love you then she never said it again until she turned seven, and it is fustrating for your child when they want to communicate something and we just dont get it, all i can say is patience, these things come at their own pace,

[Jackie]

I can appreciate that. Emily now has very good speech...but she saves it for important occasions....LOL. When she was young she didn't speak much at all. Her receptive skills were great so we knew she understood...but expressive language came only when SHE wanted to initate it and I finally figured out that me being anxious for her to speak...just made her clam up all the more.

Now she has normal conversation skill...full sentences...initiates conversation...but she can still revert to her old style of incomplete sentences...where you feel you have to read her mind. She has never been a Chatty Cathy...and for years ... I have envied those whose kids are. But must say ...because she is a bit quieter...she is always approriate and never got in trouble at school.

With grown guys with DS Emily's age...I can say that for the ones we know.... speech came even later than Emily's. Don't despair and use every means of communication you can think of to encourage it.

Jackie

[jessjetland]

Thanks for all the support and I am very lucky because most of the time I understand Sam Im just greedy and want more. We also watch Signing Time constantly Noah (my youngest) is obsessed and knows well over 100 signs and hes not even two yet. Its hard when he has passed Sam on so many things already.
Jess

[carolyn]

HI
John is 9 and his talking is getting better and better. He has had a real burst of language and increased intelligibility in the past few months, so never give up! His language has been slow, but finally we are to a point where we have converstations. I never thought we would get there. I get to hear what he likes, what he wants and how he feels. It is wonderful!
Also, he is my youngest and has always been in a regular classroom so he gets a lot of great modeling from the other kids. You can count on your younger son to help model for your older- that's a real gift!

[mydsgirl]

Hi, I haven't posted in a long while but I just wanted to add that Emma says very few intelligible words. She does babble and sign, points and gestures. This is the most frustrating thing for me. I really want to have a conversation with her also. I understand your longing completely. We just always assume our little ones will talk. BTW Emma will be 7 in June. I just keep hoping.

[CC]

My Christopher was very late at using words in fact he did not ever call me Mommy till he was 5. For some reason all those years he called me "B" BUT he finally did say Mommy even though it took that long. Now he calls me Chrissy LOLOL

He is now is 15 and speech is the area he struggles with most BUT that being said he still continues to progress in this area ;D

HUGS to you, I really can relate.

Never give up, all in their own time is my motto.

CC ~

[Jessie]

I agree with CC - never give up!!

Jason's biggest struggle always has been speech as well. We've experienced the same thing with a younger sibling moving ahead of Jason. Ellie is only two and she speaks so clearly (and loves to use signs too) that it makes it all the more heartbreaking to see Jason struggle so much. He understands us but we can't understand him very well.

Giving him different methods to communicate helps with his frustration level as well as encourages him to speak. He needs to understand the power of verbal communication.

We had a speech therapist (outside of school) evaluate Jason a few years ago. Her advice? Take EVERYTHING out of his room except for his bed and force him to communicate what he wants to us. At the time we thought that was too evil to do. Dang if we don't look back now and wish we would have done that!!! For kids that, for whatever reason, don't initiate conversation they really do need to be shown the power of communication, especially if you know their receptive skills are good.


Jessie

[jacobsmommie]

I can totally understand where you are coming from, we are still waiting for Jacob to find his voice and words, he will be 4 yrs.old in July. He does sign some but a lot of the time we still don't know what he wants, it is so frustrating. Just know you aren't alone in the waiting.

[lucy]

Greetings to all. My name is Lucy and I am mother to Ariel Moisés, 5 and I am another mom waiting for his child to speak. Ariel says a few words but he is advancing very slow. We live in Panama City, Panama (Central America) and I am also frustrated because inclusion is very low in this part of the world and children like ours do not have many opportunities to learn unless you are rich and have the resources to pay a private school where all children are required to bring a tutor.

Public schools have very little to offer, in fact, not all public schools have inclusion. My son is attending a private pre-school but they are now requiring a tutor and I cannot afford it. I am also a single mother and that makes it even more difficult; having a child with Down syndrome here is very different than what I have read and investigated in other countries like the USA. Although the current first lady of Panama has made some significant advances, people are still not ready to accept them nor treat them like any other human being. So please feel privileged to live in a country that is not perfect but it does have many opportunities for children with Down syndrome and with other special needs.

I still do not know what are we going to do in regards to school because I cannot afford a tutor and the public schools are overcrowded. Children are not getting the attention they deserve because teachers are not trained. Other people involved, like therapists, do not see the children at school like in the States. For example, I need to request time off work to take Ariel to speech and occupational therapy at a foundation twice a week. We cannot get it everyday so progress is very slow but that is better than nothing. And it is a very difficult situation for me at work because they feel I am taking too much time on my son so most times I am not considered for promotions or other opportunities.

I have faith in God that we will manage but it is something very hard to endure, especially because I am the only person responsible for all aspects of my son´s life. I want to say that although life is not easy, I am very proud of my son and I try to give him all opportunities and experiences that I can. Ariel Moisés has filled my life with infinite love and tenderness and I would not change that for all the money in the world.

I saw some messages on the NYC Buddy Walk and Ariel Moisés picture appeared in the 2006 video at Times Square, if you have the video, he is the first one to appear and he is wearing the Panamanian typical costume. They even invited me to say a few words at the park right before the walk, it was amazing and we had a great time. We were fortunate that the first lady paid for our trip so we could attend that time but you guys are fortunate to live in a country like the US, where the government and society in general are much more receptive and helpful with our children. It is not so in other countries where we are seen more like a problem and an inconvenience.

I am happy to be in this forum and if anyone comes this way, we will be glad to meet you and show you around.

blessings,
lucy