Tommy's hitting classmates...HELP!!!!

[kimallen]

Whoa! Where has the time gone???
Tommy is now 8 YEARS OLD!!!!
Is successfully integrated into 2nd Grade (for the most part) at a beautiful Waldorf public Charter school...
(which is why I'm writing)...
Lately, he has been getting in trouble for hitting/pushing some of his classmates.
It feels to me that he's attempting to get attention,
possibly a reaction to being overwhelmed.
&/or ?
Whatever the case....
the teacher is getting frustrated...
and doesn't quite know how to respond.
We're looking for ideas on how YOU have dealt with similar situations..
ALL IDEAS ARE WELCOME & APPRECIATED!!!!!
Thanks ahead of time..... x oxoxoxo
A quick update....
Tommy is developing very well overall..
After recovering from 2 bouts of leukemia,
the divorce of his Mom & Dad 2 years ago...
Adjusting to a new way of life...
including a new Step Mom..( a true blessing)..
Tommy is functioning at a high level..
He's speaking in short sentences...
Has a broad world knowledge..
Is understood by his family and most of his school mates
and teacher...
Works hard at school...... half of the time..
LOVES books...
( I believe he will be a reader one day).....
Can count to 10 on his fingers....
LOVES Scooby Doo and Diego!
Has played T-Ball quite well with the "regular" Little League team
for the last 2 years and will play again this upcoming season...
Just being a kid....
I remember having a really hard time with Tommy's Down Syndrome at first...
Mostly because of the health issues
presented at birth..
(he was born with Leukemia)
Now that that is behind us...
Life has resumed to a rather normal
way of being...
We're not unlike alot of folks in our community...
Learning to go with the flow...
Knowing change to be a constant....
Loving Life in ALL it presents...
Tommy has truly helped me to accept "what is"....
to learn to absolutely let go of the outcome....
(cause I never really know anyway!)...
And to be grateful for the gifts we a re given...
Tommy being one of the greatest gifts
and teacher....
I've ever received..
Hats off
to ALL OF YOU..
With much love and respect,
Kim

[wrblack]

Dunno. Glad to say have not been there, done that. But I think usual advice is to try to examine exactly what was happening immediately before any hitting and/or pushing incidents, investigate surroundings, environment, and context to identify trigger for hitting behavior. And, yeah, it may be just to get attention. But there's something to the idea that all behavior is in part some form of communication.
Anyway, think SOP is to identify triggers to change or modify them and then to redirect the unacceptable behavior to something more acceptable. Instead of hitting a kid while standing in line just to get the kid to acknowledge his presence, get him to offer kid a high five. Substitute high fives for punches.
MB and A probably know more and have better ideas. Oh, and Leah Spring, is Leah around? Oh, ladies, ... -- Bob

[Jodi]

Ditto Bob...

Pay close attention to him, see what is triggering the behavior. Ryan (11) was hitting a classmate. Turned out, the classmate was really annoying him. Ryan's poor language skills made it difficulty for him to be understood, and being physical stopped the annoyance. Once we figured out why he was hitting, we replaced the behavior with verbally and physically appropriate responses, such as "STOP" with his hand held up. He also uses a communication device. If another kid is being inappopriate, Ryan is one of the first to say "keep your hands to yourself" - that's a big difference!

Good luck...

Jodi

[kimallen]

Thank you Bob and Jodi.

Tommy's teacher decided to not allow Tommy to go out to recess, because after charting his outbursts, he realized the play yard and sandbox were where Tommy was getting provoked, at least a better part of the time.
I was not happy with this exclusion, as I feel he needs to have playtime outside and most importantly an opportunity to learn social skills. (Tommy LOVES his "friends").
After advocating for an Aide to observe him, at least for today, there was mutual provocation by another "special need" child.
Just goes to show me I need to really stay on top of his education. (I have been his Aide for the last three years and am being weaned for what is supposed to be best for the both of us... Hmmm.... Sometimes I wonder....).
I'll keep a heads up on this (as I'm working with other children in the school) and work with him at home.
I am seeing that it is when he's left unattended..to fend for himself and left to his own devices.....
It's unfortunately a lack of funding that allows for this lapse.
Whilst pulling my hair out in frustration....
Observing and learning the teachings
this child of mine offers (on pretty much a daily basis)...
We'll hang in there...
Thanks again.

Kim

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}