Just need to "get it out"

[andrewsmom]

I don't know if anyone still comes here that often but I just need to vent a bit. Sorry ...I haven't been here in so long and now I come to vent.
I think last time I was here I was still working as a Realtor...wow...7 years ago. Where does the time go? I have since started working for Andrew's school district. I am a short term substitute and usually work for a few months at a time. I have made some wonderful friends at work and have carried our friendships over to Facebook. However, there are times I need advice about school but I feel very uncomfortable posting on FB because his teacher is one of my friends.
We had scheduled an IEP meeting two weeks ago because we wanted to change his IEP...so he would be in the classroom more. Only the Principal and SPED teacher showed up, so we had to reschedule. We finally got our "full" meeting on Monday. It did not go well. They do not want Andrew back in the 4th grade classroom and I am not happy about this at all. His progress has been at a snails pace since being pulled out to the resource room last year.
I know my legal rights. If the child can be educated using modifications and supplemental aides in the typical classroom (least restrictive environment) then the child should not be pulled out.
They are doing math centers in 4th grade...essentially math games. They brought them into our IEP meeting saying Andrew couldn't play them. I asked for directions and modified the way he would write his information down (NOT changing the game) in seconds. They were not happy. Ughhh...so angry!!! There really is no reasoning why he can not be in the classroom. If we felt the class would frustrate him and not help his progress, we would be the first to say he belongs in the resource room. Nothing against it. Honestly, Andrew loves the kids in his class and would do much better if he saw the other kids working on the same things he was working on. Peer pressure works great with Andrew.
They did agree to put him in on "trial basis" for 6 weeks and then come back for another meeting.
Sorry...I just really need to get this out before I explode all over this teacher and Principal. I feel so heartbroken. He deserves a chance. I believe he will blow them all away if they give him a chance but I think they are trying to sabotage this trial. ughhh....
Sorry so long.

[Emilysmom]

Trisha,
I'm so sorry you are going through this. How frustrating!!! Maybe Andrew will totally amaze them and make them re-think how they view inclusion. Surely they know that he doesn't have to be doing exactly what the other students are doing to be included. Sounds like you're being totally realistic. Sadly, you may have to be the one who comes up with some of the modifications. But you have the law on your side. Stick with what you know is best for Andrew; even if it gets very uncomfortable.
Maybe this trial will go really really well!! Hoping that's the case.

[Jackie]

I think Susan is right...we often had to come up with our own modifications...it all seemed so easy to me...but....

[laurasnowbird]

It is the responsibility of the special education teacher to modify classroom curriculum to make it accessible to your child in the regular classroom. If the special ed teacher doesn't have the skills, then it is the school's responsibility to get him or her the necessary training. Period. Not your problem, it is theirs. Remind them nicely, they seem to have forgotten. ;D

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

Hugs!!!

[Jackie]

I know it's the schools responsibility but I often found that if I had a good answer and presented it as "Have you thought about....." it was often well received. I agree I should not have to have had that responsibility but in the long run Emily came out the winner.

[laurasnowbird]

I don't disagree with that thought, Jackie, you certainly catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. But I've also found that the more "I" am willing to take on, the less the school will put themselves out to do.

I'm no expert on curriculum modification, and it's becoming harder as Ethan gets older. The school should be the expert, and we shouldn't have to do their jobs for our kids to be properly included. There have been plenty of times that I had a suggestion that worked beautifully, but there have also been challenges that I didn't have an answer for, partly because I don' t have those challenges with him at home - because the dynamics are different. I need the school to be invested in his success, and to take ownership of it as well. I'm frustrated by feeling like we should have to beg, and tiptoe, and ask permission for what should be a given.

[andrewsmom]

I think I have a tear in my eye...people "get it" here! I miss this place!!!
Yes it is very frustrating, but I now have modified some math games as well as a social Studies booklet. *sigh* I know the school should be doing this, but I also want him to suceed. It seems like a fine line sometimes.