Meghan - school question

[meghans_mom]

hey everyone...
just was looking for some input -- or maybe similar stories w/ your own kiddies.
Meghan (3yrs 3months) is in 1/2 day preschool 5 days a week - there are 9 other kids (3-5 yrs) in her class. Meghan is the youngest in the class...not that this is an issue.
My question is...When Meghan is in class - music or circle time and they call on her she doesn't do much. Like if she's supposed to point to her head, then her knees, etc she just stands there. She KNOWS all her body parts, colors, #s, letters - yet she doesn't let the teacher know she knows them. And in music she doesn't participate much, even though she can sign or sing all of the songs. At home the kid is a regular performer...
We do all the same stuff at home (one on one or w/ her dad and grandma) and she does it all.
She's never been that way in any of her other classes...I've observed her in her classes before and she was always "right there" doing stuff.
This class is bigger than any other she's ever been in (about double the size) and it's new since January.
They keep telling me she's so shy - but I never see her to be that way. At the stores she's like Miss America saying hi and waving to anyone who makes eye contact.
And of course at home, you can't stop her.
My mom was in her class today for grandparent day and she said Meghan barely participated at all...but there were alot of strangers there today too.
So - I'm a little upset that she hasn't "shown them her stuff" in this new class...at parent-teacher night the teacher was surprised when i told her all the stuff MM knows - and she probably thought I was exagerating.
I don't want MM to get left behind (not literally) because she may be shy or overwhelmed in situations like this.
She loves going to school and runs right in to see her friends, so it's not that.
One of the problems, i think, is that the poor child has been in 3 different classes, with different students and teachers in less than a year.
Do you think it's just something that will come as she matures more?
She's supposed to go into an integrated full day program in the fall and I don't want to put her there if she's going to digress or become even more shy.
It's another change for her - and I feel bad because she's moved through all the classes so quickly - integrated would be really good for her, but it will be more changes again.
Hope you can make some sense of my ramblings...maybe I'm just looking for reassurance that I'm doing the right thing.
sorry for babbling! laurie

[samanthajosmom_12]

i read your posting. how long has she been in this new class? can the teacher give her one on one for a few days or spend extra time with her. she just might not feel ready to show that bubbly personality off yet. i think with all the moving she might feel unsure of her surroundings right now. i think she will be okay in time. sue

[sunnie]

Laurie,
My daughter paige (non ds), who is now 9, is just now coming out of her shell, she has been like that since the day she was born. I think it's just personality. she was in 2nd grade last year, and she had one of those teachers that really just needs to retire, very intimidating, well to make a long story short, she wouldn't read for her nothing,. well i got a call saying we want to classify her she doesn't know how to read blah blah blah, i said you people are nuts, she is an avid reader, well it came down to months of heck, and trying to prove to these people that yes she can do the work etc.. well finally i had the principal teacher etc,, stand outside the door through the window while my daughter read , laughed played etc.. she just wouldn't do it in front of this teacher. no problems after that.
I have 3 other kids, thomas 7, 40 year old in a 7 year olds body , sara 3 mrs broadway, adn emma 1 (ds), who is regular little girl at home, plays and has fun etc... but when we are out in public, she is the life of the party, she starts shakin the booty, laughing yelling.
so through all of my babble, what i am trying to say is, maybe it's personality, a larger group then she is used too, or just being in the spotlight thing.
well hope all goes well. good luck
Sunnie

[MB]

If your district has an inclusion specialist, request that Meghan be observed and data taken. The teacher could be doing any number of things wrong.

1. Asking multiple questions without waiting for answers i.e. "Hi Meghan (1), I like your shirt (2), how was the bus ride (3). Overwhelmed, she shuts down.

2. Meghan is whisked into activities without being given the time to ease into the class.

3. She cannot hear the teacher. (School pays for audiologist checkup.) Hearing in our young kids can fluctuate.

4. She cannot see the teacher. My son's vision went from normal to signifcantly farsighted in six months - somewhat typical for young children with Ds.

5. Meghan needs some info she is not getting. Maybe she needs to be reassured that she will go home every day after class. (Don't think this is it because she should have figured that out by now.)

6. Meghan is working on a developmental milestone and cannot participate while her brain in working on getting ready for potty training or talking or social leaps. Our son spent every summer working on some milestone. We would leave him alone and by the end of the summer he had done some surpising thing like quadrupling his vocabulary, teaching himself to swim, using the internet etc...

7. Observe, observe, observe and write down everything! Maybe you will find a pattern.

Good luck,
MB

[meghans_mom]

Thank you all for your input. MB - I'm going to request that I meet w/ her teacher and also sit in one day next week to see for myself what is going on. Your suggestions are excellent! (as always!) I never even thought of the hearing thing or anything else you suggested for that matter :-) She did get glasses a few months ago, so hopefully her eyesight hasn't worsened again!
I peeked my head in today when I went to pick MM up and all the kids were sitting around the little table drawing.
Meghan had finished already so she was just sitting there staring into space and sucking her thumb. All of the other kids were being engaged by the aides, teacher or therapist. It does bother me some that MM doesn't get as much attention as the other kids -- but I don't mean that in the way it sounds (not that every person should find my daughter the most charming and most adorable)...but that it seems that she is sometimes left out and I'm not sure exactly why that is.
I was also extremely shy and reluctant to participate when I was in school - and it just got worse for me as time went on. I try to push MM to do things she's interested in, and to join in - because as I said outside of school she's soooo different!
anyways - thank you all again for your input. I'm going to print it out and discuss my concerns w/ her teacher and also ask the therapists what they've seen because I'm sure it will be different from what I'll see when I'm in the room myself :-D
laurie