End of ESY report for Russell - warning LONG

[momofrussell]

Well, I was reading the letter/report from the ESY teacher. She isn't his normal teacher, they usually get a different teacher for ESY each year. I find it quite interesting on what the teacher had to say about Russell and what Kevin and I see in Russell's daily life. A bit different then what Russell's school year teacher says about him. Remember, Russell did NOT get a school age DX of Autism for they all said they didn't "see" the things we did or equate it to having Autism... just Russell have DS and visually impaired. And keep in mind, they look at Autism AS a DX, not a set of characteristics that are brought about due to the dualness of the DS and Vision probs Russell has. I am going to type what the teacher/aides had to say about Russell for the summer. Read on...this is verbatem from her letter...

***

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Bievenue,

Russell was a delight to have in Room 9 this summer. He didn't require any transition time to get used to the new teachers; he just went about his business as usual Russell enjoyed riding the class roller coaster, playing with musical toys, and playing outside on the playground equipment.

In the area of communication, Russell used mainly facial expressions and body language to indeacate his wants and needs as well as his likes and dislikes. Vocally, Russell would grunt or cry to communicate. He did not imitate neither sounds nor sign over the summer. Russell showed much difficulty with transitions, especailly from the playground to inside, or from one room to another, and did not follow one-step directions for activities he did not desire. In the classroom, Russell preferred isolated play to that of parrallel or interactive.

In the area of OT, Russell was not able to imitate drawing a "+" or "O". He was also unable to greasp and release objects using simple tongs. Russell was able to assemble a 6 piece puzzle, but required assistance for where to place the pieces. Russlel demonstrated functional grasp patterns on small objects, but still fisted crayons.

In the area of PT, Russell walked up steps alternating feet with handrail and supervisor. He also walked down steops marking thime with one handrail and supervisor. Russell accessed age-appropriate playground equipment with supervision for safety.

We were all so pleased to work with Russell, and help you and your family enjoy the remainder of this summer !

Amy Tucker, Teacher
et. al. (2 TA's, SLP, COTA, PT)

*********

Now, none of this is new to me personally. But what I see is the Autism, NOT the DS coming out here... At our recent IEP/transistion meeting they ALL claim Russell does signing which I ALWAYS have to correct them by saying he does NOT initiate, and sometimes doesn't mimick after verbal and physical prompts. (side note, Russell isn't imitating any signs lately at home, VERY rarely than usual.) They also claimed at the IEP that Russell DOES parallel play.. something I do NOT see AT ALL, nor have I ever... What they call parallel play is that Russell will go off and play with something, a child will go aside him and do his/her own thing, and that is parallel play to them... or he will use the light table for stacking and playing and another child will come up and use the table too... But Russell is NOT interacting with these children.. just like this letter just stated. Also, WE have transistion probs at home and his teacher says they don't see it... but obviously the ESY teacher saw what we saw... HMMMM???

"He just went about his business as usual"... THIS is the reason I can't wait until the Fall class. There is still lots of free time for Russell in the Focus Room where he has been for 1 1/2 years... where Russell can play with those V-tech toys and do puzzles.. things they call "appropriate behavior" and Kevin and I call self stim... he doesn't use the musical toys appropriately if he is pushing the same d**n button 50 times in a row... come on now! I also wish Russell would show them at the school that he does have a "normal" voice there somewhere.. :lol We, every once in a blue moon hear it, they never did the whole school year nor did they in ESY according to the letter. I have suggested ways WE do it at home.. who knows if they are doing what we do... but we obviously have a WAYS to go in speech and communication.

I am glad I got this letter today. It's a new look at Russell from another teacher. I am going to make copies and pass them out... :lol Seriously though, we are going to see our Ped Neuro and I will show him this and talk about what the other teachers see or don't see... I know ESY was only for 5-6 weeks, but having someone else see him and having other feedback helps. I do think I remember at the IEP meeting the coordinator requesting some Autism testing or something to that effect... Maybe they need to see this letter too. Thank goodness when Fall gets here, those light up toys won't be around for Russell to have

**and another side note ** I want you all to cherish what your children are doing in their daily developement. Russell is 6.4 yrs old and has come a long way but STILL has a VERY LONG way to go... kids 1/2 his age w/DS are doing better in all areas... you guys don't know how frusterating it is.. things I still keep inside.. this IS my reality... I am going to make an appt to see the Ped Neuro, hopefully next week, and discuss it all. The doc said it's the Autism getting in the way of the speech and communication... I hope it IS just that, and nothing else... I would give ANYTHING for Russell to do what your kids do... or even 1/2 of it.

This mom I know who's son, Luke as DS and was in Reece's EC class last year always asks me what services Russell has and questions why I get what I get and why she doesn't. She and I actually met at Target prior to the school year last year and by chance, Reece mentored in Luke's class. Luke's mom is already wanting Luke to be held back at 6 for another year like Russell was, and they are adamently saying NO. BUT.. she STILL has one more full year of school for Luke, he is ONLY FOUR! Luke can talk some, sign, understand, look at you, play with kids, acknowledge kids faces/names, can sit still and be polite, ect... and she thinks he isn't going to be ready for Elementary school/Kindy come a year from now... It makes me sick to hear it sometimes.. it really does... She hasn't met Russell so I try to explain that Russell get's what he does for a reason. I wish she didn't try to ask me and compare our sons JUST because they both have DS.... because Russell doesn't JUST have DS... and they just don't get it...

Oh well, thanks for letting me ramble. My day was going really well this AM until I had to deal with testing stuff for Regan (its going to be held off until Sept which makes me mad) and I got a headache. I was reading this letter and the letter itself didn't bother me, it's really nothing new for Kev and I, but I wonder if we are being harsh, or somebody is candy coating it. Who knows, I will just tuck this letter away with my papers for Russell and just take note...

A.

[meghans_mom]

A -
It's amazing, isn't it -- what an 'outsider' will see when they don't have any preconceived notions.
From Luke's mom's point of view -- I sort of understand it but I also totally see that she should know that her son and Russell...just as any 2 children, are not the same. I think it's hard for parents who don't see other kids w/ disabilities, or who only see and hear the diagnosis -- even in their own child. I know probably 30 or 40 kids w/ DS around Meghan's age....but I don't know any of those children well enough to know where Meghan compares to them. Not that it should matter but heck, as parents - we *do* compare alot, even if we know we shouldn't. Not that I'm comparing for the sake of saying my child is doing worse/better than this child...but is she where she should be. It's hard to know. But this woman should understand that Russell has other obstacles in his way that affords hime different things than her child.

that being said...I have a question about Russell and his speech -- has anyone ever discussed an augmentative speech device for him? I know he is visually impaired, but I would think there are devices our there that would take that into account? I was really just curious if they think something like that could help him -- sorry if I'm being nosy. My girlfriend's daughter just started using a Dynavox because her communication is very delayed (she doesn't have DS, but 2 other chromosomal problems)
And thank you for reminding us to love our children and to be happy with their progress, whatever it may be. I think you are one heck of a terrific mom, and friend --and not only is your family lucky to have you, we here at UM are too!!
(sorry if I rambled on and didnt make any sense!)
hugs, laurie

[momofrussell]

Laurie, it's funny you mention the Augemtative devices. Other moms have suggested that and I looked online about it before this last IEP and talked to Russell's teacher about them and possible other speech impairments. She and the ST believe that most kids that are TRYING to talk and don't have a disability that really impair their speech don't benefit from one. Now, I found a site a while back that discusses that and the different kids and what they are for.. and that they might really be useful for a child like Russell... not including the PECS and signing which are NOT effective so far with Russell.

We (they more than me) are suggesting PECS again with photos, mostly the ones I will give them from Russell's "world" here.. I am NOT going to do the PECS thing much longer... I keep asking if there is SOMETHING in between PECS/SIGNING and FULL BLOWN Augmentative devices... I WANT my son to communicate some how....

maybe the Ped Nuero will have some suggestions when I go...

Thanks for listening.. and rambling with me LOL

A.

[christie]

A ~

Just a few thougths I want to shoot out to you, hope you don't mind

Frist thing that came to mind after reading your post, how about taking a video of Russell at home and how he acts, plays, maybe even get his voice on there. Pesonally I would even ask that they video him at school and compare the two. Maybe even play the video at the next IEP meeting, like I said just a thougth.

I also wanted to share girl that at Russell's age Chris too did not participate in parallel play either, took him a long time and even now he will play with others but then just goes on to do what he wants, when he has had enough Nooo kidding girl OMG can I relate to Chris pushing the same freaking button on somthing over and over and over and now his big thing is rewind the video to a certain spot play it rewind play it rewind OMG Another thing he will do is Chris has baskets and baskets of trucks and he loves to line them up all the time and tells me he is making a parade, Hmmm kind of cute BUT he would rather line them up then play with them Hmmmm Anyway the reason I am sharing all this is I have always thought, Chris has many Autistic (sp?) tendencies(sp?) BUT they tell me he is NOT, Hmmm To be honest girl I am not sure how they would know one way or the other He may not have it but boy oh boy does he have lots of the tendencies (sp?) I tell you.

Another suggestion and just brainstorming here for you Do you have any programs in your area just for children with Autism?? Maybe you could visit and even bring Russell and see what a trained teach dealing with autism might have to offer you or suggest.

I will tell you girl Chris has had and still does an Augmentative Communication Device but he would rather ramble on with the verbal, even if we can't understand him, then use it Christopher knows what he is saying its just the rest of us that don't

HUGS girl, I myself have always wondered if Chris had more goiing on then DS but since all kids with DS are all different and do things at their own time, I am not sure how the heck one really knows what is from DS and what isn't ?? KWIM??

Ohhh and one other I can totally realte to you girl, YIKES transistions OMG when Chris was Russell's age OMG a total nightmare BUT it has gotten much much better. Still room for improvement but BETTER

Just wondering girl I know Russell has the eye problems but I can't remember how is his hearing?? Cause one thing I did find with Chris that even thou his hearing problem is very mild the hearing aides have helped him. Its almost as if he was missing things and we had noo idea

Sorry I am rambling here, I just wanted to share the Chris too did lots of what you say Russell does and seem to take longer for him but he got there. MAN I wish I had the answers girl

CC

[Debi]

Oh A I can so relate to all of your post Gabe does not have the dual DX but yes many many things resonate and you are so right about having other people see the kids I do think the report was very valuable.
One thing I wanted to jump in here and say was to ask about a "Big MacK device for Russell if you are thinking of aug. communication. It's just a big button that can be programmed to say hello..toy please.. (whatever simple phrase for example) one touch is all it takes to activate it. I suggest it as a STARTING point for Russel because one thing you want with any work with speech is sucess and this is a quick way to get to it. It's something I think might really help Russell.
From what you said about his IEP/school year I am not sure if they have very high expectations for Russell.. if they are just letting him play and occupy himself.
I could be very very long here but I as a practical matter one thing I would look at for Russell is the aug. device and take a look at the Big Mack device.

[laurasnowbird]

Awww, A. big hugs to you! You may not realize it, but you are an inspiration to many of us here on UM. You are so focused in your efforts to help Russell do his best. I understand what you are saying about how much some of the kids can do compared to Russell, and reminding us to appreciate it. Thanks, I personally needed that reminder. Maybe sometimes we get so caught up in what we'd like for them to be able to do that we take some things for granted. I'd like to think I don't, but after watching a mom with a severely disabled child in a wheelchair the other day, I think maybe I was fooling myself. I'm sure she would give anything for her child to walk, and here I was obsessing about how LONG it was taking Ethan to get to it.

The DS-Autism one is tough, any way you look at it. Ethan has a number of autistic tendencies, and from what I've read, that is very common in the DS population. I am convinced that he is not autistic however, he is simply too social, and makes good eye contact. It has been suggested to us that we redirect those behaviors, and we certainly try, but it can be exhausting. We have noticed over time that once we have overcome a particular repetetive behavior, it tends to go awy. HOWEVER, he always seems to come up with something new to replace it. Wonder when he'll run out of new things to do?

I listened to a lecture by Capone at the Down Syndrome Convention, and there were two criteria that had to be met for a child to be considered autistic. I am going to look for that tape, and listen to it again. I went to his lecture about dual diagnosis because I had concerns at that time about many of the behaviors Ethan was exhibiting.

I can relate to the toys, and the repetitive use of the buttons. We have any number of those kinds of toys in the house that belong to Victoria, and he drives me crazy with them sometimes. Leap Frog's Phonics Pond, and her Fisher Price Phonics Desk are the worst offenders. I can only hope that he is also learning something while he is pushing all those buttons.

Vent to us any time you need to, we're always here to listen. I hope you are finding time to do something for yourself, because I wouldn't be surprised if those headaches are caused in part by tension. I've started running again, and I swear it has saved both my sanity and my life. I don't enjoy running (UGH!) but I sure like what it does for my frame of mind. I'm training for a ten mile road race this summer, and it has been nice to focus on something for myself for a change. Just a thought! Hugs again! Laura

[Robin]

{{{HUGE HUGS}}} to you bud!!!! I read your post twice and do you know what I saw? I saw one strong tough mom, the best that Russell can get!!! You also see things exactly as they are and dont try to sugar coat them, did you know I love you dearly??!!!!!
I know having a dual DX stinks, I understand you with our having Chase with his several weird things going on all at the same time.
I do see some resemblances with Chase and Russell the muscle, like the parallel play, Chase still doesnt do a whole lot of it (sigh, I have decided it is okay) he didnt even try til last year when he was in fourth grade and it was forced upon him. He is quite content to sit and play by himself.
He also (it was pointed out when he was in UofM hospital) does alot of the repititive stuff when playing, pushing buttons, etc and EXACTLY like CC's Christopher, he gets all his containers of trucks and cars out and lines them up through out the entire house, and woe the person who knocks them out of line as he knows exactly wher each one is suspose to be. He also has these things called rescue heroes, 48 to be exact and vehices that go with them and he lines them up thru out also. He insists on watching the same tape or DVD OVER & OVER & OVER again.
They said he has alot of autism's tendencies but does not have autism. I think some of our kids are like that. And I understand how it is having some moms want exactly what you are getting for your son or daughter even though it is NOT the same situation. I also know how easy it is to compare our kids without meaning too, I am sooo guilty of that and I should NEVER do that as Chase is in a different catagory then other kids who simply have DS and nothing more. LOL, listen to how I worded that!!! I also know I see kids or hear stories and think, thank GOD for Chase being as his is and not having more issues!!!
You made me stop today and think about how blessed we all are and how we should NEVER take our child for granted and just be thankful for what we have and the abilities they have!!! I know I have resented the fact that Chase cant do as much as other children with DS can and his behavior may never be the same as most of our kids with DS but it is okay, he is Chase, he wil be what he can be and I am thankful for all he is and will be. He has issues but we will deal with them one at a time and if needed we will learn to live with them as they are, so be it.
Thank you for sharing about Russell today, I think it is great you got another perspective on the muscle man, and i am interested in hearing more about this comunication device, although I have said it to you from the beginning and I will continue to say it..... Russell will talk some day A, I will never stop saying that it may take alot of time, and his autism may have to get out of the way first...but your boy, he is going to talk, when he is goood and ready and has something he wants to say
I love you kid!
Robin

[momofrussell]

Thanks Guys, I will post more later (due to my REALLY RAD headache I have right now) but wanted to stay, yes Russell has had his hearing ck'd. He was sedated and in the hospital when they did it. the ABR kind i think. We had his hearing ck'd because a few years ago we DID think that was the prob... long before the Autism thing arose.

Laura, According to the two top STL Ped Neuro's here, it's 3 criteria not 2.. for Autism... No eye contact, No social interaction and repetitive, self stim behavior. That is the small of it... there is a list, and depending on what doc's reports you read, it can be quite lengthy, food adversions, visual impairments, all sorts of things, but that is the small of it. And that is Russell.

I know we have talked about children w/DS having repetetive behaviors... but Autism is NOT just that...

Oh, and Laura and I had to LOL at the jogging you mentioned. My doc wants me to start walking... I have YET to do that.. I know the benefits of exercising and stress and the wonders it can do for you.. but I am still sitting here.. yes the headaches are stress, always have been. I use to handle it so well, I guess alot has gone on this last year that I am handling more and my body is reacting differently... VERY differently.

I really can't WAIT until the Fall... there will be LOTS more structure for Russell which is NEEDED for him to learn... NOT lots of free time to where he can self stim.

Ok... I gotta go lay down.. I have more thoughts and questions , especially about the augmentative devices and speech.... but my head is taking over...

Thanks guys...I'll be back, probably tomorrow

A.

[laurasnowbird]

A.

As far as the autism criteria, if Russell fits the criteria, have you tried an independent evaluation? That was going to be my route if my suspicions were confirmed at the convention, because my school district is pretty stingy with the autistic label. I've heard parents of kids with ds-autism say that it was the program designed to address their child's autism that did the most for them, not just treating them like they have only Down Syndrome. I'm glad that you feel the fall will be better, I know that when Ethan does self-stim it really stresses me out and makes me anxious. He used to drive me CRAZY in the car, kind of sucking on his tongue, honest to God it sounded like he was going to SWALLOW it! I finally found that if I play kids music (like Disney Silly Songs) he won't do it! If I hear him doing it, I turn his music down, remind him to put his tongue in his mouth, and after he does it, I turn the music back up. The weird thing is, I think he was quite simply bored, and did it to entertain himself.


I hear ya about the headaches. My doctor was the one who recommended exercise for me as well, but first he recommended drugs for anxiety. I was driving myself quite crazy, and in the early part of the spring, I just kind of fell into a deep hole I didn't know how to get out of. It scared me more than just a little, I'll tell ya. I've always been an upbeat, optimistic person, and it seemed that I temporarily lost that. And I haven't been dealing with this for as long as you have. For me, starting to run again was almost like deciding I wanted to live again. My life had become so consumed by Ethan's needs and therapies that it seems I almost disappeared in the process. And I'll be honest with ya, I HATE running, but I love what it does for me. My oldest son will hand me my running shoes and try to shove me out the door when I'm getting mean and nasty, LOL! I am unable to run at any time once the day gets going, so I am getting up at 6am three days a week and going out for my run. It is soooo hard to get out of bed at that time, the kiddos are sleeping, and the house is peaceful, and I just want to keep sleeping. I got up 45 minutes late this morning, arguing with myself about doing it, but once I got out of bed and did the run, I was feeling so much better. It's the only time of day my DH is home and I can run during the summer, cuz he works ridiculous hours in the summer months.

I know that for me, some of the changes I'm experiencing in how I deal with things may be related to age! I'm 41, and things are changing. Double ugh. I really believe there is a cumulative effect to some of the stress, and you've gone through much more than many of us. You are one tough chickie! I'm holding off on drugs for now, told my doctor that I would try taking better care of myself first, and give diet and exercise a chance, but if I found that didn't work, I would be back for a prescription! So far it is working really well, but of course school is out and the schedule is so much easier. The real test will be when the school year starts and the craziness begins again.

Russell is soooo lucky to have you - you are a great advocate for him, and better yet, you love him unconditionally. I know of lots of typical kids who aren't that lucky!

[wrblack]

Hey, A.,
Sounds to me like that teacher's report could be very useful. Hope it comes in handy. And hope the rest of your summer contains less stress and fewer headaches, both the literal and figurative kind.
I think I want to wait until I have a copy of developmental pediatrician's report in hand adding autistic spectrum disorder to my Charlie's list of dx's before talking to school program about this and possibly calling for a new IEP. But I certainly expect to do something before regular school year starts. But we start late. Charlie's ESY runs through the middle of August. Then he gets about 3 weeks off before school starts back after Labor Day. So, I think I've got some time to work this out.
Yes, I think I know something of how you feel about other kids being ahead of Russell at half his age. Our main motivation in visiting developmental pediatricians, including Dr. Capone, and Ds Clinic/Trisomy 21 Program was to address the question of why ain't he walking and talking at almost 5 yrs old. Nobody promised we'd like all the answers to our questions.
And, ya know what, I still ain't ready to trade kids with anyone, not even you.
Hang in there. Hope you're feeling better soon. And, as Scarlet always said, tomorrow's another day -- wonder what she meant by that, is that supposed to be a good thing or a bad thing?
Regards,
Bob

[momofrussell]

Laura, Russell's Autism DX is from our Ped Neuro, they are the ones that specialize in that stuff. As far as school goes, he does NOT have a "School Age DX" for Autism (which an eval has to be done at age 5) because he does NOT fit their "criteria". But, their test is a paper test, and it usually only fits children that are JUST Autistic, not children that have DS and are visually impaired. It really doesn't matter anymore about it, just so they DON'T let him self stim in class. Which is most of Russell's days... lots of stim'ing.. he does lots here too. But in school he needs to learn KWIM? That is why the new class in the Fall will be great, hopefully.

I think my headaches aren't coming from this, it's the bullcrap I am dealing with the doc's for Regan and testing actually. I think I mentioned we went to a new doc a while back, a new psychiatrist... she is great, but we then started seeing a psychologist and need to have testing done because the school testing won't be done until probably Spring of next year. Well, after going to this new office for some time now, I really don't like the way they handle things... and after referals, acceptence letters from my ins, and such, I never get anywhere unless I call them... they do NOT call patients to set up things, or call you to tell you something has changed... they say they don't operate like that. And the tester is only there on Thursdays and will be gone for the next two weeks, and on top of that, they say testing probably won't be done until Sept! THAT is why I have a rad headache LOLOL. I regret opening the can of worms I did, trying to get Regan the help she has always needed at school.. because all it has caused us is anguish and heartache, for Kevin, Regan and I.... St Louis has a behavioral institute that I may give a try, after that, I told my husband enough! Hopefully with the skills and knowledge we have learned over the past 1 1/2 years, we can help Regan as much as we can...

sorry to digress.... I obviously have lots on my mind this last few days...

A.

[rickismom]

Look, the autistic continuim is very wide, and an independent evaluation may very well be in order. CC's idea of a video is also very good.

Its hard to have a child who is doing less than the DS "norm"- no doubt about it. Thank G-d that Ricki is doing so well. However, you will always find people who complain that you are getting more than they are, not realizing how good they have it. Ricki gets 100% disability payment from the government (non-USA)(most kids with DS get only 50%) because I had another family member with chronic illness when Ricki was evaluated. Those who hear I get 100% often react like I stole it from them....

Sometimes its touchey being the mother of the "better functioning " kid. When Ricki was born, a friend with a child one year older came to talk with me. I thought to myself how I'll always be able to look at her son and know what is coming. Well, Ricki passed him so quickly, and I am sure it hurts his mom. I try to always ask how her son is, and not toot Rickis horn (brag) when she's around--- but it is delicate going. So I'm NOT surprised that some people DON'T manage to be delicate, but only notice the extra services you get (and need).

[momofrussell]

Independent Eval from whom? He goes to a Ped, sees an Ped Eye doc, gets evals from school and sees a Ped Neuro who is specialized in the field of Autism and DS-Autism... so who else is there? Other than DT's, ect... that I would have to pay for. We see the eye doc more than ANYONE... and our eye doc is very good at what he does and knows what behaviors are stemming from Russell's eyes, and what is beyond that... and so does the Neuro.

Maybe I went off on a tangent and I was misunderstood.. I don't feel the need for an independent eval... It's not going to make a difference anyway... Russell has seen 3 Ped eye docs for his cataracts, two refused the implants saying that is wouldn't do a DARN bit of good to my son's developement and one agreed with what we were trying to convey (thank goodness we finally got the implants!)... so I guess I could get evals after evals to finally hear what I needed/wanted to.

I WOULD love to see someone more qualified in the speech catagory than the school specialists... hence my other post on the STL Speech and Hearing Center. And me needing to take Russell back to the Nuero for a ck up. We don't have DS clinics in STL so that option is out. I would bet the farm that Russell's lack of speech and communication is from the DS and Autism, but I really want to rule out anything else, AND talk about things that might help OTHER than PECS and signing, because I don't know how much longer I can stand them trying this with him and it not working.... and yes, they are fully aware of my feelings on this You'll never see a pic of me with a SHY NON VERBAL label underneath it.

The school isn't going to change their perception of Russell which is ok with me, just so the treat Russell accordingly, and they do.. I was just stunned that someone else finally saw what WE saw...

I do think that maybe a video tape might be a good idea. Who knows if I'd get off my lazy rear for THAT though... right now, I feel more like complaining and feeling sorry for Russell LOLOL...

Sorry, I am pissy lately... I have lots going on here and in my head that we need to address with 2 kids here. I guess some things rubbed me the wrong way towards the end of this week that happened at home and I am being more verbal with my feelings more than I usually do on the subject of Russell.

I LOVE to read all the wonderful things other kids are doing... but I DO get bummed that my boy doens't do most of those things yet... it's ok though.. Someone might be on the other end of my rope someday... It all evens out one way or another.

Ok.... need to leave my pity party and go upstairs...

A.

[christie]

A ~
I actually thinks its GREAT you share your honest feelings here girl Cause last I looked there were over 700 or more members here but just a fraction of that number actually post. BUT you never know whose reading girl and who can relate and who you helped by sharing

I NEVER look at your posts as a pity party, and even if it might be, we ALL have them and it helps to get it out, least it does me ;D

And YES girl I know what you mean, its very nice when someone else see's what you see and knows what you are talking bout.

CC

[momofrussell]

Hey CC, if you lived next door I could give you a BIG SMOOCH on your cheek and a BIG HUG! Thanks! ;D

We shall see where my headahces take me today, I was REALLY crabby yesterday for most of the day... I had to take meds twice... I have to wait until they kick in and take me to la la land and relax me LOL We have TONS to do so let's hope my head is AOK today...

A.