Post by kwisteena1021 on Jan 16, 2006 8:38:18 GMT -5
I think this is just too awesome not to share! ;D
From last week's Nevada Reno Gazette-Journal: "A Shared Life"
RENO, Nev. (AP) _ Meet newlyweds Stacy Ann Bachtell and Jan Edward Nowinski. They said ``I Do' seven months ago at Lord of Mercy Lutheran Church in Sparks.
It took a lot of gumption for Jan, who is very shy, to ask Stacy out.
They both remember when he finally did.
``She was talking to a friend at the Y, and I went up to her,' Jan said.
He admits he was drawn to her looks.
``She's so good looking,' he said.
Their first date was to see ``Princess Diaries,' a sweet story of a girl who finds out she is a princess. She liked it. He didn't.
They fell in love.
Jan proposed at Applebee's after asking Stacy's dad, Russell, for his daughter's hand in marriage.
Jan is 53, and Stacy is 31 _ an age difference her family teases them about.
``Sometimes we joke that he's the older man,' said Stacy's mom, Rhonda.
They admit they've had their typical couple disagreements. One fight was over who would win the Super Bowl. Stacy threw her engagement ring and lost it.
``He thought New England would win, and I wanted the 49ers. He ended up being right,' Stacy said. She replaced the ring with her own money.
On paper, their lives look ordinary. They bowl on Wednesdays with two other married couples. Jan is a nationally ranked Special Olympic bowler.
``I'm the best one in the group,' he said.
They shop for groceries on Tuesdays, and they always make sure they have enough money left over to have a date night once a month.
``It's hard sometimes because I'm on Weight Watchers and Jan isn't,'
Stacy said, as she picked out Diet Jell-O during her weekly grocery shopping trip.
The only difference between them and the scores of other newlyweds learning the ropes of living together, managing a budget and learning to deal with in-laws is that Stacy and Jan have Down's syndrome. The syndrome is the most frequently occurring chromosomal abnormality. It occurs in one of every 800 to 1,000 births.
But their differences didn't stop them from having a very traditional wedding. Two friends from work were bridesmaids. Stacy still has pictures of her bridal shower hanging in her bedroom. Her mom helped her find a long white wedding dress.
Stacy gushed that Jan looked very handsome in his tuxedo.
The night of their honeymoon, a one-night stay with a room service breakfast at the Reno Hilton, Jan went to get ice wearing only his boxer shorts and a robe. He got lost in the maze of rooms, and hotel security had to help him find his way back.
Stacy and Jan both laugh about that now.
The couple moved into a new apartment two months ago. They are saving for a new couch. Dollar by dollar, they are saving to replace the older floral print one in their modest two-bedroom apartment in south Reno.
They both work at High Sierra Industries, a manufacturing facility for people with disabilities. Both assemble bolts and screws for companies. With benefits from the state and a regular paycheck, they are able to make ends meet.
Their wedding in May was a commitment ceremony, not a legal wedding, because the couple would lose benefits if they were legally married. Eventually they want to make it legal, but for now it's impossible.
``You learn the system isn't necessarily working for you. You learn how to work with the system,' said Mark Link, who works with the couple.
Link has worked and trained people with disabilities for 15 years and helps them make grocery lists and stick to a budget.
According to LaVonne Brooks, executive director of High Sierra
Industries, people with disabilities struggle to make ends meet.
``It's ridiculous, sometimes people here are getting checks for 37 cents or something like that from the state,' she said. ``It's tough. They really have so little and what they do have sometimes goes for prescriptions.'
Jan and Stacy have about $75 a week each left over after bills for groceries, personal items and entertainment.
If they legally wed, the state would cut benefits by about a third, according to Judy Smith, manager of Supported Living Assistance, a branch of HSI.
``They have so little to live on as it is that the way the system works, to be legally married, they couldn't survive,' Smith said.
But to Stacy and Jan, this marriage is official.
``I like being married because I have a husband now,' Stacy said.
``Tomorrow Jan has the day off but he's still going to walk me to the bus because the sidewalks are icy. He has to walk me to the bus because he's my husband,' she said.
The grocery clerks at WinCo know the couple. The tellers at Bank of America say hello.
When Stacy was born, the doctor recommended she be institutionalized.
Stacy's mom, Rhonda, has been her daughter's biggest advocate.
``I had to fight for her to be in a normal classroom when she was young,' said Rhonda.
Today, Jan and Stacy are close with her family.
``The kind of support Stacy has is just amazing. She had a family who really taught her to be independent,' said Beverly Marshall, who works with the couple four days a week in their home.
She helps them cook and navigate the bus system.
Marshall said she has tried to make them feel like part of the community by introducing Jan and Stacy to store clerks. She also helped the couple move into their new apartment, which was a struggle to find.
``We had to find something they could afford and an apartment where the bus was on the same side of the street as the apartment,' she said.
Teaching the couple to be married has been rewarding, Marshall said.
``They are so independent that they had to learn to share things and count on each other,' she said.
One of the first things she taught them was to walk together, she said.
``They were going the same place but walking apart. Now they walk side by side,' she said.
And side by side is where Jan and Stacy plan to stay.
From last week's Nevada Reno Gazette-Journal: "A Shared Life"
RENO, Nev. (AP) _ Meet newlyweds Stacy Ann Bachtell and Jan Edward Nowinski. They said ``I Do' seven months ago at Lord of Mercy Lutheran Church in Sparks.
It took a lot of gumption for Jan, who is very shy, to ask Stacy out.
They both remember when he finally did.
``She was talking to a friend at the Y, and I went up to her,' Jan said.
He admits he was drawn to her looks.
``She's so good looking,' he said.
Their first date was to see ``Princess Diaries,' a sweet story of a girl who finds out she is a princess. She liked it. He didn't.
They fell in love.
Jan proposed at Applebee's after asking Stacy's dad, Russell, for his daughter's hand in marriage.
Jan is 53, and Stacy is 31 _ an age difference her family teases them about.
``Sometimes we joke that he's the older man,' said Stacy's mom, Rhonda.
They admit they've had their typical couple disagreements. One fight was over who would win the Super Bowl. Stacy threw her engagement ring and lost it.
``He thought New England would win, and I wanted the 49ers. He ended up being right,' Stacy said. She replaced the ring with her own money.
On paper, their lives look ordinary. They bowl on Wednesdays with two other married couples. Jan is a nationally ranked Special Olympic bowler.
``I'm the best one in the group,' he said.
They shop for groceries on Tuesdays, and they always make sure they have enough money left over to have a date night once a month.
``It's hard sometimes because I'm on Weight Watchers and Jan isn't,'
Stacy said, as she picked out Diet Jell-O during her weekly grocery shopping trip.
The only difference between them and the scores of other newlyweds learning the ropes of living together, managing a budget and learning to deal with in-laws is that Stacy and Jan have Down's syndrome. The syndrome is the most frequently occurring chromosomal abnormality. It occurs in one of every 800 to 1,000 births.
But their differences didn't stop them from having a very traditional wedding. Two friends from work were bridesmaids. Stacy still has pictures of her bridal shower hanging in her bedroom. Her mom helped her find a long white wedding dress.
Stacy gushed that Jan looked very handsome in his tuxedo.
The night of their honeymoon, a one-night stay with a room service breakfast at the Reno Hilton, Jan went to get ice wearing only his boxer shorts and a robe. He got lost in the maze of rooms, and hotel security had to help him find his way back.
Stacy and Jan both laugh about that now.
The couple moved into a new apartment two months ago. They are saving for a new couch. Dollar by dollar, they are saving to replace the older floral print one in their modest two-bedroom apartment in south Reno.
They both work at High Sierra Industries, a manufacturing facility for people with disabilities. Both assemble bolts and screws for companies. With benefits from the state and a regular paycheck, they are able to make ends meet.
Their wedding in May was a commitment ceremony, not a legal wedding, because the couple would lose benefits if they were legally married. Eventually they want to make it legal, but for now it's impossible.
``You learn the system isn't necessarily working for you. You learn how to work with the system,' said Mark Link, who works with the couple.
Link has worked and trained people with disabilities for 15 years and helps them make grocery lists and stick to a budget.
According to LaVonne Brooks, executive director of High Sierra
Industries, people with disabilities struggle to make ends meet.
``It's ridiculous, sometimes people here are getting checks for 37 cents or something like that from the state,' she said. ``It's tough. They really have so little and what they do have sometimes goes for prescriptions.'
Jan and Stacy have about $75 a week each left over after bills for groceries, personal items and entertainment.
If they legally wed, the state would cut benefits by about a third, according to Judy Smith, manager of Supported Living Assistance, a branch of HSI.
``They have so little to live on as it is that the way the system works, to be legally married, they couldn't survive,' Smith said.
But to Stacy and Jan, this marriage is official.
``I like being married because I have a husband now,' Stacy said.
``Tomorrow Jan has the day off but he's still going to walk me to the bus because the sidewalks are icy. He has to walk me to the bus because he's my husband,' she said.
The grocery clerks at WinCo know the couple. The tellers at Bank of America say hello.
When Stacy was born, the doctor recommended she be institutionalized.
Stacy's mom, Rhonda, has been her daughter's biggest advocate.
``I had to fight for her to be in a normal classroom when she was young,' said Rhonda.
Today, Jan and Stacy are close with her family.
``The kind of support Stacy has is just amazing. She had a family who really taught her to be independent,' said Beverly Marshall, who works with the couple four days a week in their home.
She helps them cook and navigate the bus system.
Marshall said she has tried to make them feel like part of the community by introducing Jan and Stacy to store clerks. She also helped the couple move into their new apartment, which was a struggle to find.
``We had to find something they could afford and an apartment where the bus was on the same side of the street as the apartment,' she said.
Teaching the couple to be married has been rewarding, Marshall said.
``They are so independent that they had to learn to share things and count on each other,' she said.
One of the first things she taught them was to walk together, she said.
``They were going the same place but walking apart. Now they walk side by side,' she said.
And side by side is where Jan and Stacy plan to stay.
