Potty training..?????

[andrewsmom]

Ok guys, I just read Sue's thread on potty training. I'm soo not looking forward to this headache. In one of the replies someone said ( I'm sorry I can't remember who)that 4 was young to potty train a child with DS? I know they sometimes have issues with Potty training because of the low muscle tone and sensory issues. But 4 years old is young??? Really???

I was planning on starting Andrew this summer because he will be over 2 years old. When I told my sister I was planning on this she said "I can't believe you would try to potty train him.....you're just setting yourself up for a let down." I was very offended by her comment, but maybe I shouldn't have been? Is she right? Should I wait until he is older? I started all my other kids very young, and with the exception of my oldest, they were trained before they were 2.

Am I wrong to think I could train him at 2 years old? Have any of you had success at training around 2 years old? If not, what is the average age when you started to potty train? I know different kids have different issues (sensory, communication etc) but when would be the best time to start? Any personal experience would be appreciated. Thanks!
-Trisha

.... Andrew has not shown any signs that he is interested in potty training but neither did any of my other kids.....until they were shown.

[Connie]

Trisha,

NO!! In my personal oppinion 2 years old is not to young. I started training Collin at about 18 months. The key word was started and it has taken awhile to become completed...to this day we still have accidents every once in a while and he just turned 6.

I am not like most parents here. I don't beleive in letting the kids show me that they are ready to start toilet training. I believe this is like anything else we train our (any) kids. I believe that we have to train them to recognized the signs their body is showing them and yes this does take time and there are a lot of messes and misses.

We started out small with Collin at that age. We would set him on the potty before he got in the tub at first. Then after a while we went to when he first would wake up in the morning and right before bed time. Then we tried to add a couple of times during the day. Once he new how to potty in the potty and could some what let us know he had to go....we got rid of the pull ups and that's when we really started to make our biggest strides.

We also used M&M for a reward and also something we called the "Potty Dance"...quite interesting especially when your out in public.

I can Collin has been potty trained since he was probably 3.5 to 4 years old. I can't way we have not had any accidents. For the last 2 years for some reason in the month of January (don't know if it is sigificant or not) he started having accidents at home....like 4-5 a day for a 3-4 week period. Now this only happened at home or my moms house (child care) and never at school...don't know why but just as soon as it has started it also has stopped. We have had medical test run on him...to make sure he's not diabetic...etc. But this is still a mystery and a thorn in our side.

Oh....Collin has taken a while to learn complete control and still has problems...which could go along with low muscle tone but if he really has to go he will sometimes dampen himself...not an accident just a little damp from where he could not get his pants down in time but that is also starting to go away.

And as far as night time training.... it will be 1 year in May that I threw the pull ups away and got brave and since I have done that he has NEVER (knock on wood) had an accident and I can't even say that about my 8 year old (who I just changed his sheets because of this)...but that happens...no biggy!!

Good luck!!!

Connie

[ethansmammy]

I agree with Connie. But I wouldn't expect things to go the same way as it did for your other kids - it didn't with mine - my other two were trained at 2 and 2 months, day and night. Ethan is 4.5 and is still not fully trained, but wears regular underpants all day - I have to take him every couple of hours and he instantly performs and gets all the congratulations, but won't ask - and he is capable of asking. We have had various stages of success since he was two - and then have given up to try later, but I think if you don't try you won't know. If I waited for Ethan to give me a sign he was ready, I don't think it would happen for a very long time yet, but he is ready and happy to go, he goes at play school too now which is a big breakthrough. My big goal is for Ethan to be fully trained by Kindergarten and I expect we will have to keep working on it until September, but that's fine, we're not giving up.

I know of someone who had their child with DS potty trained at 3. It does of course depend on abilities, but I think if you don't try you'll never know.

Good luck,
Elaine.

[meghans_mom]

Meghan was totally ready to be trained at 2 or 2 1/2 - it was right when Matthew was born and I totally dropped the ball. She stayed dry all night and showed all the signs of potty readiness. I missed a golden opportunity with her and then it took much longer once I got around to it...
All I can say is TRY. If it doesn't work, then you go back & do it again another time. Since you've PT'd your other kids you know what signs to look for, etc...so I'd say go for it!
good luck- laurie

[andrewsmom]

Thanks for all the encouragement. I'm going to go ahead and start him. I think I'll buy him a potty around his Bday in March. I think you're all right...if I don't try, I won't know.

Connie....hehehe we also did the "potty dance" for my 3 other children. One time we used the restroom at a pizza place and you should have seen the faces of people when we came out...LOL!!!!...I guess we were a bit loud that day!!

[ALLISA]

Trish,

I am afraid I am the one who said 4 seemed young to potty train....so you can yell at me for your stress ! LOL

Everyone does things differently and it is all personal choice. WIth my 2 older boys I started them when they JUST turned 3 and they were 100 % trained within 2 weeks and by that I mean that I didn't have to ask, remind or take them hourly to the potty.

I prefer a short training to a looonnngggg stretch of running to the potty every hour to "try".

I remember my mom telling me when Connor was 2 that she was going to "train"him.....yes......I came home to find him sitting on the potty in the LIVING ROOM with a lollipop in one hand and an icecream in the other watching tv.....he could have sat there for 2 hours and accdientally peed in the seat......I don't consider that training !! LOL

Anyways.....I prefer to train later and be done quicker.....as I said in the last thread I waited until Erin was ALMOST 5 and even at that it took a good year to feel confident that she is "trained".

But even at Erin's late age....she DID NOT show signs of "readiness"...she isn't verbal....but I really wanted to try and I'm glad I did.....if I waited until I thought she was really ready....I'd probably still be waiting !

You'll make the best choice and I wish you the best of luck when you both begin !

Allisa

[andrewsmom]

LOL Allisa....no yelling here. You do have a point that the longer you wait, it usually means the quicker the process. I'm going to start Andrew so I will know whether he can do it or not. If we need to put it away and try later, then that's ok too. I relly won't know until I give it a try.

I have read before how it may take longer to train children with DS. I just never heard how much longer or at what age. So I guess I was surprised that it could be so late. But no yelling from me, you stated your opinion and that's why I come here. I like to hear ALL points of view. Thank you for sharing yours!!!
-Trisha

[Pat]

Connie..Yes we too do the potty dance in public ;D
No, I don't have too much pride not to, too important not to do it LOL
I think every kid is different. I did not wait for signs from John-John. I would try periodically with him. When you try to put him on the toilet seat & he struggles to stay away from that hole that he feels your going to flush him down, you need to waitLOL I'd say can't hurt trying.
Pat

[Emilysmom]

Maybe this has nothing at all to do with anything......lol, but here is our potty training experience. We adopted our oldest son (now 24) when he was 2 1/2 and were told that he had been completely trained by the time he was 18 months old. NOT. He had more anxiety over everything related to a bathroom than any kid I had ever seen! And, sadly.....he is the one kid who continued to have accidents until he was 11 or so!

With our next son, Justin.....we waited till he was nearly 3 and bought this little doll that you "feed" water in a bottle to, and then she goes "pee". We made a big production on how happy we were for this doll when we raced her to Justin's potty chair, and told Justin HE could do the same. He did not share our enthusiasm, but was trained in a few weeks. Never thought to use M&M's but he would have loved that! Also didn't try putting Cheerio's in the toilet for him to use as target practice.....I learned about that here, and he would have enjoyed that too!

With Emily.......we did NOT get into a hurry at all. We did begin at about age 3 to put her on the potty to poop at regular intervals because I SO wanted to avoid the poop in the bathtub routine her body seemed to be on!!!! Because of her constipation, it was a bit easier to "train" her to poop on the potty.......we had time when we saw her little face get red to race her to the bathroom! She went to kindergarten in pull ups, and it truly was NOT a big deal. I doubt if the other kids were able to tell she had them on, and she was able to stay dry for LONG hours..........sometimes, she would come home from school dry and use the potty as soon as she got home! I still say, she was about 6 1/2 before she was totally trained. BUT..........she never had accidents at all after that point. No night time accidents. No daytime messes, at all. So..........for us, it worked out better to be laid back about it all and just wait.

On the other hand........we have a friend whose child with Ds is almost exactly the same age as Emily. She had a baby brother who was going to arrive around the time she turned 2, and her mom was determined to have her potty trained by then..........and she was!!!

Susan