Post by Cbean on Jul 26, 2006 22:41:18 GMT -5
Hey everyone!
I kind of have a problem with the month of July. Two years ago today I had my amnio. Wow, two years ago Al was catering to my every need. Sigh. (Oh wow - my Uno anniversary is coming up!)
A year ago tomorrow, Emily was admitted into the hospital and we started the incredibly grusome world of infantile spasms. I can't believe that it's been a year. It's so amazing to think that two years in a row I was an emotional and physical wreck. I'm not this year. It's really cool, but kind of scary. I'm waiting for something to happen - August get here quick please!!!! Still kind of stressed, but finally destressing. I feel as if I've been through hell and back. It's like some sort of post traumatic stress syndrome, but I have to say my heart is finally feeling lighter again!
This morning I dropped my son Ryan off at camp, then went to the grocery store with Emily. There she was sitting up in the shopping cart making her sounds and snapping her head all around to see every thing and everyone. Then when I was checking out the cashier said hello to her and Emily looked right at her and gave her the biggest smile. Only a half a year ago I would have never thought of putting her in that cart b/c 1 she wouldn't have been able to sit up in it and 2 I'd have to worry about her hitting her head during a seizure. I felt such a warm fuzzy feeling - this is big guys, this is big.
There are times I still feel bad when I see her peers, especially her peers with DS doing so much more than her. Then I remind myself of all Emily has been through in her short time here. Then I marvel at how much she is doing.
She has beautiful posture. She has a gorgeous smile. Learned to scoot on her but and turns around in circles on it. She's ticklish - very - and has the cutest little laugh when you get her in just the right spot. She is finally using her hands and playing with toys. She is knocking things off shelves and starting to cause mischeif! Finally holding her own bottle!!! She has pulled herself up to sitting a couple of times now - never while I was watching!!! When I walk into the room she lights up and comes crawling to me...I don't even care that she crawls like a seal. Lucky for me they just happen to be my favorite animal and it may turn out that it will be her Halloween costume! She doesn't hug yet, but she'll grab your hand and pull it close and rest her head on it. Or bite it - LOL- depending on where we are on the teething chart! The point is it's all starting to come together and I'm starting to feel human again.
I just picked up a book called "The Kid Turned out Alright" and I can't wait to start reading it. I internalize everything and always find a way to blame myself for it all. I hope to get over that soon - if only there was a little pill for that. Hmmm....
Well I just had to share and update on my little bug here.
Love to all,
Christine
I kind of have a problem with the month of July. Two years ago today I had my amnio. Wow, two years ago Al was catering to my every need. Sigh. (Oh wow - my Uno anniversary is coming up!)
A year ago tomorrow, Emily was admitted into the hospital and we started the incredibly grusome world of infantile spasms. I can't believe that it's been a year. It's so amazing to think that two years in a row I was an emotional and physical wreck. I'm not this year. It's really cool, but kind of scary. I'm waiting for something to happen - August get here quick please!!!! Still kind of stressed, but finally destressing. I feel as if I've been through hell and back. It's like some sort of post traumatic stress syndrome, but I have to say my heart is finally feeling lighter again!
This morning I dropped my son Ryan off at camp, then went to the grocery store with Emily. There she was sitting up in the shopping cart making her sounds and snapping her head all around to see every thing and everyone. Then when I was checking out the cashier said hello to her and Emily looked right at her and gave her the biggest smile. Only a half a year ago I would have never thought of putting her in that cart b/c 1 she wouldn't have been able to sit up in it and 2 I'd have to worry about her hitting her head during a seizure. I felt such a warm fuzzy feeling - this is big guys, this is big.
There are times I still feel bad when I see her peers, especially her peers with DS doing so much more than her. Then I remind myself of all Emily has been through in her short time here. Then I marvel at how much she is doing.
She has beautiful posture. She has a gorgeous smile. Learned to scoot on her but and turns around in circles on it. She's ticklish - very - and has the cutest little laugh when you get her in just the right spot. She is finally using her hands and playing with toys. She is knocking things off shelves and starting to cause mischeif! Finally holding her own bottle!!! She has pulled herself up to sitting a couple of times now - never while I was watching!!! When I walk into the room she lights up and comes crawling to me...I don't even care that she crawls like a seal. Lucky for me they just happen to be my favorite animal and it may turn out that it will be her Halloween costume! She doesn't hug yet, but she'll grab your hand and pull it close and rest her head on it. Or bite it - LOL- depending on where we are on the teething chart! The point is it's all starting to come together and I'm starting to feel human again.
I just picked up a book called "The Kid Turned out Alright" and I can't wait to start reading it. I internalize everything and always find a way to blame myself for it all. I hope to get over that soon - if only there was a little pill for that. Hmmm....
Well I just had to share and update on my little bug here.
Love to all,
Christine