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Post by Chester on Oct 6, 2006 10:55:01 GMT -5
JT's preschool teachers just left. They were here to check off one of their two required home visits.
I'm crabby, and I know it, and I feel like I deserve the right to be (The dry wall guy who started a job in March, promised he'd back at 8 am. it's now almost noon, etc, etc) BUT one of JT"s teachers really irritated me.
She was telling me about a mom complaining that her child was afraid of the monster game being played on the playground. Kids are growling and chasing each other. It took about 5 minutes of her talking in circles then it hit me....she meant JT.
So I said, "do you mean JT is the scarey one". She said yes and continued to tell me that there are a bunch of kids that play and that she feels it's great social interaction time. SO WHY BRING IT UP?! Handle it. I'm not sure what she wanted me to do or say. I just said "okay and that I can guarentee that JT isn't trying to be mean or scarey, he's playing."
I do wonder why this Mom would single JT out. Yes he has DS, yes his skin is darker than all the others......I've already told myself that more than likely this other little boy hasn't ever had a close connection to an african american and especially one that is non-verbal but noisey all at the same time.
But I don't want to be logical. I'm a grouch today.
Dawn
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Post by kellyds on Oct 6, 2006 12:13:15 GMT -5
I'm sorry the teacher was insensitive. I hope someone explained things to the little boy who was scared.
What is a required home visit? Is this for public school? Couldn't you refuse? That seems very intrusive to me. (((hugs)))
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Post by ALLISA on Oct 6, 2006 12:51:09 GMT -5
Just wanted to add that we have naever had a home visit either...but every system is different.... As far as the "scary game" goes....it reminded me of when my oldest was in preschool. All of the girls wanted to play "chase" and would call my oldest, "come chase us, come steal our treasure", etc, etc.....and typical boy he was more than happy to CHASE...then the girls grew tired fo it 10 minutes later and were crying that "connor won't stop cahsing us...he;s trying to steal our treasure" and the poor boy got yelled at once by a mom of one of the girls. I was soooooo angry because he was set up for failure......if they know the "chase" game is going to be called off within minutes then jsut don't allow it.....any child has a tough time getting that it is "over" because the POINT OF THE GAME is to make them run and scream....how can he differiantaite between good yelling and screaming and "we are all done" yelling and screaming. You are right, If anyone is getting upset by the game....it is up to the teachers to make a decision about it and handle it.
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Post by mommygwen on Oct 6, 2006 12:53:22 GMT -5
My Greg also likes to play the growling and chasing game. The hard part is that he doesn't pick up the cues quickly enough that a child is done with the game. He also goes to far with the spin around 'til the back pack is flying and may hit somebody game. Because his communication is so difficult, others are confused and even afraid. My tactic is to explain to others (adults and children) that he doesn't know when the game is done, or that someone may not want to play. Just tell him "I'm done." "I don't want to play." Be very direct with him and he complies....usually.
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Post by momofrussell on Oct 6, 2006 16:58:23 GMT -5
*sigh** Ok...now I am crabby! LOL.. Oh wait, I am already crabby... I agree that it's a GREAT social game but come on now.. instead of commenting to you that JT is the scary one (all the time I take it?) and other kids are bothered but the teachers like the inteaction.. HOW 'BOUT.. the silly teachers ROTATING the "scary person" and letting all the kids have a chance to be the scary one. We can assume that sometimes in these situations, they like one kid only to be the scary one and I would hate JT to be singled out for this. I'd suggest mentioning to the teachers that the game can continue but how about some taking turns. Wouldn't that teach ALL the kids AND JT things like taking turns, interaction to the scary person, teacher interaction, ect.? That would work better for me I do like the home visit idea!!!! I would LOVE for Russell's teachers AND docs too actually, to come over and observe him and understand how he is at home!
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Post by kellyds on Oct 6, 2006 18:29:18 GMT -5
Ah, well, it's the word "required" that ruffles my rebellious feathers!
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Post by CC on Oct 6, 2006 21:08:23 GMT -5
HUGS girl We all are entitled to be grouchy now and then and Man oh Man can I relate to workers saying they will be here at a certain time and not showing up. Geeze I think we should bill them for our time wasted waiting around BTW we never had "home visits" If you don't mind could you share what they are all about?? Inquiring minds would love to know. I'm with you, not quite sure why the teach brought that up with you, Hmmm especially since she feels its fine the game they are playing. Maybe on a day you feel better you might want to ask her, just a thought. BTW hope the dry wall guy showed up for you CC ~
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Post by char on Oct 6, 2006 21:21:22 GMT -5
Since I believe that the teacher should know how to maintain control of the kids in her care, she should know how to take care of the playground issue. That's not something she needs to bring to you. You aren't there for recess or lunch, and she is.
Hang in there and know that I would be pretty grouchy too if some teacher had decided to try and make me responsible for playground issues that she should handle.
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Post by Emilysmom on Oct 7, 2006 6:55:16 GMT -5
I'm scratching my head over this one Dawn, but I'd be crabby too if I were in your place! Like A said, this game might be ok IF the "scary person" was rotated all the time!!! Having JT be the one the kids ran away from all the time is just plain WRONG. To me, rather than being a great social time, it singles him out and makes him seem even more DIFFERENT than the other kids. Just what should NOT be happening at school! I mean...........how often do we point out how much our kids are LIKE all the other kids? This kind of game seems to do just the opposite. I'm thinking this class needs a group talk about Down syndrome, about how JT is just like the other kids, etc. And if one of the girls is afraid of him, or afraid of the "scary game"........the teacher (NOT YOU) should find something else fun for her to do, or stop that game altogether.
I've never had a home visit by any of my kids teachers, but I wish they had done that!!! Even if they are "required to do it" (meaning they aren't doing it just cause they WANT to get closer to the kids and know them better), I would love for them to see my kids in their most comfortable environment. What a cool way to know them better. I'd just want to know they were coming, so the dishes would be done and beds would be made!
Susan
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Post by Chester on Oct 7, 2006 10:36:00 GMT -5
Thanks all!
First home visits: They aren't required by the law or anything. The school district did decide that the preschool teachers should make two a year. I'm sure you can say you don't want to participate. It's part of the teachers job decsripiton, thus required to them, to make the attempt.
I'm very glad that they do this. This is our first visit from this district. JT is very quiet at school. I don't think they believed me that he is FAR from quiet at home. They got to see him in action, and now know to expect more out of the little bugger. We signed up for the days and times we would like them to visit. So I did have time to tidy up, probably another reason I was so grouchy, lack of sleep from the tidy job!
A lot of districts have dropped home visits because of "risk" to teachers, and it is expensive. (teacher time, mileage) The district we moved from in WI for awhile left it up to the individual teacher if they wanted to do them or not. Then dropped them completely.
The reasons why they do home visits, so they can see the kids in their "comfortable enivornments", to have time to talk to parents in an enviornment that parents aren't threatened in, etc.
Second: I knew that I wanted to say more to the teacher about the monster game, but my thoughts weren't organized enough, plus I've learned when I'm on the grouchy side of life, sometimes it's better to let things sit a bit.
I do intend on writing in JT's notebook AND talking to her again on Monday. She did say that other kids are doing the chasing as well, it's not just JT. That's why I wasn't sure why this Mom had just singled out JT.
Dawn Oh and CC~No, the dry wall guy NEVER did show. The carpet repair man did a nice job and was here when he said. The Bobcat guy came later than he said, did a great job, except for cutting the phone line in half! How is your house coming along?
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