Post by steffipoo on Jan 11, 2007 13:36:42 GMT -5
My brothers funeral was yesterday. Talk about a beautiful service... Ya know when the guy from the mortuary called me up to see if I wanted to see Chris I was sooo sad. Cause besides the fact all the nuns from the convent at the school I went to my whole life usta make us go to the chapel and UGGGG see the old dead nuns body and kiss their rosary which was round their very wrinkly old neck. And it ususally was the nuns we didn't know the old ones that still lived in the convent. I had to do that from 5 years old when I was in 1st grade.So needless to say I have an aversion to open caskets.
So the mortician he asks me if I wanna see my bro says Chris looks GREAT and I immediately turn to mush. I say NO can't do it and then the thought I can't get out of my head is he looks great. I cursed this nice man out in my head thinking gee how GREAT can CHRIS look. He looked great at Christmas and the days folling Xmas.
Well yesterday I kinda regretted that decision.Not sure what I did was the right one yet not sure I shouldn't have seen him. Or should I have?It could go either way. I hate second guessing myself.
One last thing. I told this story for my mom and dad at the funeral and in the end of the story it says something to the effect of enjoy every bit of happiness now and store it up so when you see him it'll be a great gift. One of the last lines talks about looking out for joythings, like butterflies etc.Well yesterday we did the funeral went to the cemetary(just our immediate close family) and when they took the casket out annd set it up for a final prayer and set it down something amazing happened.the minister was saying a final prayer and I hear this gasp i and there is silence I was looking down then I get a tap on the shoulder from my cousin.She points to above the casket. I look and see about 60 monarch butterflies just circling the casket. They landed on the casket all of em and then flew away within a second of landing.Now I was there prior to the arrival of my brothers body and not a butterfly in sight and there were more flowers there than I have seen at any funeral ever. OMG OMG OMG I'm not one to be a huge believer of signs etc. Or so I thought. I got that from my mom and she is worse than I. A true cynic. Well I look over at my mom and grabbed her hand and we just watched this go on she squeezed my hand when they flew away and I smiled for the first time. Guess Chris being a fellow cynic had to show us in a A BIG way he was there and leaving us. weird and cool all at the same time.This is still very very hard but a ray of sunshine was with us yesterday.thats it had to share that
((HUGS)) steff
So the mortician he asks me if I wanna see my bro says Chris looks GREAT and I immediately turn to mush. I say NO can't do it and then the thought I can't get out of my head is he looks great. I cursed this nice man out in my head thinking gee how GREAT can CHRIS look. He looked great at Christmas and the days folling Xmas.
Well yesterday I kinda regretted that decision.Not sure what I did was the right one yet not sure I shouldn't have seen him. Or should I have?It could go either way. I hate second guessing myself.
One last thing. I told this story for my mom and dad at the funeral and in the end of the story it says something to the effect of enjoy every bit of happiness now and store it up so when you see him it'll be a great gift. One of the last lines talks about looking out for joythings, like butterflies etc.Well yesterday we did the funeral went to the cemetary(just our immediate close family) and when they took the casket out annd set it up for a final prayer and set it down something amazing happened.the minister was saying a final prayer and I hear this gasp i and there is silence I was looking down then I get a tap on the shoulder from my cousin.She points to above the casket. I look and see about 60 monarch butterflies just circling the casket. They landed on the casket all of em and then flew away within a second of landing.Now I was there prior to the arrival of my brothers body and not a butterfly in sight and there were more flowers there than I have seen at any funeral ever. OMG OMG OMG I'm not one to be a huge believer of signs etc. Or so I thought. I got that from my mom and she is worse than I. A true cynic. Well I look over at my mom and grabbed her hand and we just watched this go on she squeezed my hand when they flew away and I smiled for the first time. Guess Chris being a fellow cynic had to show us in a A BIG way he was there and leaving us. weird and cool all at the same time.This is still very very hard but a ray of sunshine was with us yesterday.thats it had to share that
((HUGS)) steff