? potty in the car

[Chester]

Okay, for those of you who have already been here done this....how in the world did you handle potty training in the car?!

I put JT on the toliet before we head out and buckle into his booster seat. I think the cold air has something to do with making him "go". The other day, he signed "potty" as soon as I sat him down in his seat, luckily we were at home, so we went back in the house. Now he signs it just about everytime I put him in the car. Sometimes, it's a ploy to not get in the car, other times he's wet by the time we get home.

The car, and sleeping are the only times we're experiencing accidents.

He's pretty much non-verbal (even though that hurts to say, sigh), so I can't see his sign when I'm driving. Don't even know if he signs while he's in the car.

We went to an art museum today, about an hour away. I broke down and put a pull up on him for the ride. AUGH. He was wet on the way up (he fell asleep also), but dry on the way home.

Any suggestions?
Dawn

[lespring]

PULL UPS! I always hated Pull Ups but I sure liked them for the car!

[Pat]

My mom always said a jar w/ a lid worked until I came along. She just kept it under the front seat for such emergencys. I had 2 older brothers
Pat

[Emilysmom]

GREAT question Dawn!! We kept a jar with a screw-on lid in the car for that purpose; especially on any kind of "long" trip....like the one you mentioned to the museum. (He he he, we've been known to use the paper cups with lids that we got from McDonald's, etc for this purpose too....then just tossed them into the first trash can we saw).
It worked great if my husband was driving and I was free to help the boys with it or vice versa. (opening the lid, not spilling the contents, etc). Wouldn't be nearly as ideal if there was no one available to help the little guy with it.

[Emilysmom]

And LOL this reminds me of something Emily and I saw last weekend on our way to Adrienne's house!! I have been very interested in all of the potty training discussions here and I love seeing how dedicated everyone has been to this task.............BUT. Emily and I went to Olive Garden to eat on the way to St. Louis and there was a family in the lobby waiting for a seat at the same time we were waiting for our seat. They had a little girl, who looked about 3 years old. And she was carrying around one of those potty seat cover things (plastic things you put over the top of a regular toilet seat so the child's little butt doesn't fall through?) everywhere she went. I had to giggle! I mean, has this child been trained to ONLY potty if she has that seat? Seemed kind of "gross" for her to be carrying it through the restaurant to me. Oh well.....I'm so glad those years are behind me!!

Susan

[MB]

The only advice I have Dawn is to stop all prompting. Do not put him on the toilet before you leave. Do not use pull-ups. Every time you take responsibility for him by prompting or using diaper products, I believe you are telling him he is no longer expected to get his pee and poop into a toilet. You will take on that responsibility for him.

mb

[trishasmom]

I grew up with my parents telling me to go to the bathroom before we got in the car and I did the same with my typical son who is grown now in fact most families I know typical or otherwise remind their kids to go to the bathroom before getting in the car. Heck I am grown and I go to the bathroom and sometimes we don't get very far down the road when I feel I have to go again (sorry for to much info) but the point I'm trying to make is that sometimes motion might stimulate the bladder into thinking it has to go again and maybe our kids don't know how to hold it as of yet. As for the using pull-ups, it just makes sense to do something that will both keep the child dry and the car dry. When you get ready to leave maybe everyone can have a turn at the bathroom so he sees it isn't just him that needs to go before getting in the car? If he has learned that if he signs bathroom once he is in the car he will soon learn that even if he gets out to go to the bathroom he will still have to get back in the car and the fun of it will wear off eventually. You can also set up rewards for him so that if he is dry ath the end of the trip (each way)he gets something special (it doesn't have to be something bought, it could be as simple as getting to sit and be read to or playing a favorite game with his favorite person etc.)and if he is wet then just go about your daily business and not say anything to him. I have expectations for Trisha but I do not set them higher than I would for a typical child and I do modify them to meet her abilities. :-) I try not to set her up for failure rather go in small steps so she builds up her self-confidence and wants to move on to the next level. Somethings come easier than others for our kids and what one child can do and understand might not be the same for another child. Go by what your gut instinct tells you after all you do know your child best. :-)

[lespring]

I don't necessarily agree with not using ANY diaper products. When Angela was potty training, we lived an hour from anything. Even the grocery store was an hour away. EVERY doctor appointment was more than an hour away, and our specialists were almost 2 hours away. There was no way I was going to stop every 1/2 hr for her to go the the bathroom. We'd NEVER get where we were going. (or have to leave so exceptionally early that a trip to the grocery store would use up the entire day) Angela was well out of daytime diapers by the time she reached her 3rd birthday. We also started before she could walk. (she walked at 27 months). My mom thought it was nuts, but you know, I'd worked with a lot of kids who had a wide range of disabilities long before Angela came along, and we had kids in wheelchairs who were getting themselves to the toilet. There was no reason Angela couldn't crawl to the toilet just like she crawled to the table at dinner time. As long as she understood what we were doing on the toilet (and she did) there was no reason to wait until she was walking. Also, the new pullups are great, that have the "cold" sensation when they get wet.

Now, night-time is a totally different issue. She was out of night time pull-ups for about 3 years, and then she started having problems with chronic UTI's. (mostly cuz she'll only go to the bathroom twice a day unless you MAKE her go in there more often!) And because of the meds she takes, when she does sleep at night she sleeps very sound. I can oten kind of tell what kind of night it's going to be, so sometimes she's in pull-ups at night, and sometimes she's not. Sometimes with a pull-up on she'll get up to go to the bathroom, and sometimes she doesn't. The nightime thing just drives me crazy! The night she wears a pull-up, she wakes up with it dry about 80% of the time. But put her to bed without one and she pees 2 or 3 times during the night. UGH!! She also HATES the pull up and often shreds them, but I hate wet sheets even more, and can only do so much laundry bedding and still have time for the other wash! LOL

[Chester]

My biggest issue is how did your kids TELL you they had to use the bathroom? He and I are in the car by ourselves a lot. At home he says "eeee, eeee" while signing potty. In the car we talk all the time, It's a lot harder for me to figure out his babbles without being able to see his hands...gotta watch the road.

Any suggestions on how to help your kids tell you they have to use the bathroom if you can't see their hands?

I'm torn on the pull-ups. JT is totally the type of kid who takes full advantage of using it if he has one on. We've just been using them at night, and has amazed us with how well he has done....Except the car and sleeping....double wham-o when he falls asleep in the car!

I have noticed a difference, now that we're not prompting him to use the toliet while at home. No accidents and it's not a struggle to get him to sit and go when he's ready.

At school, it's a different story. They have a strict bathroom schedule up on the door. He hasn't gone once for them, but hasn't had an accident either. He's always up for a good battle, now he's taken on, no way I'm going potty if they ask me to. The teacher is older and just is sure schedules are the way it gets done.

Thanks for all the ideas

Dawn
Who grew up with sisters and would have never ever have dreamt the bottle in the car technique or carrying the toliet seat everywhere you go...wow!

[trishasmom]

some people have two rear-view mirrors in their car, one for driving and the other angled so they can see their child so that they can see what they are signing. :-)

[laurasnowbird]

We have gone with the no-prompt method, other than continuing our habit of directing Ethan to the bathroom after meals to keep his constipation under control. We've eliminated prompting after two out of three meals, and so far, so good, but we are monitoring that verrrry closely. Pain associated with BMs cause Ethan to withhold, which would probably result in a serious step backward with toileting.

Other than that though, we aren't prompting at all. Not before car rides, or even before bed any more (and Ethan is not wearing a pull-up, and in almost four weeks, only had one night-time accident - I think it was the second night) We are finding that as he gets more confident with this, he RESENTS being prompted. Case in point, grandma babysat Friday afternoon while I took sis on a field trip. She's still nervous about the whole potty training thing, and kept asking him if he had to go. When I got home, she was worried, cuz he hadn't used the potty, and mentioned it the minute I walked in the door. Mind you, she was only here from 1:30 to 4:00. She asked him AGAIN as I was taking my coat off, and I made light of it and asked her to leave him alone about it, he'd go when he was ready. Sure enough, she got her coat on, and while I was talking to her on the porch saying goodbye, he headed off down the hall and did his business. I was LOL at him waiting for her to leave to go!!!! As she was pulling out of the driveway, I motioned for her to roll the window down and told her he used the potty - and she said "That little stinker!". ROTFL!

I had one of the mirrors that Carol mentioned, but it is hard to drive and watch the mirror. Maybe he could kick your seat? LOL! Ethan sits behind me, and if he didn't talk, that is what I would ask him to do.

I'm curious, the time that you got in the car and he signed potty, did he have to go?

As far as the night times, I think as long as long as kids have the out of the pull-up, they're less likely to learn to exert control. It has worked for all three of my kids so far to put them to bed without pull-ups when toilet training, and after all I had read about kids with DS and training, I'm amazed that I had the courage to try it with him. And of course, I underestimated him. On a side note though, some families have a tendency to develop that physical maturation slower, and from generation to generation, the kids have difficulty with wetting the bed at night, often until they are adolescents. It happens more often with boys than with girls, also. That is a fact that you wouldn't happen to have about JT, but I would still bite the bullet and try it cuz you don't know until you try! Good luck and HUGS!! Laura

[Kristin]

Perhaps this is off the wall, but how about a picture (icon) of a toilet with a small whistle, bell, or sound making device attached. Could he use that to make a sound you could hear in the car to signal he needed to go?

[MB]

Kristin,

I like your idea. I can see a laminated (laminating machines sell at Walmart for under $30 and are great) picture of a toilet with some miniature sleighbells attached to it and the entire thing tied on a string to the carseat. The miniature bells can be found at craft stores.

mb

[hannahph]

You probably will think I am nuts but I used to drive around with a potty chair in my trunk. I put a plastic bag in it and a maxi pad in the bottom. the maxi soaks up the urine and then you can tie closed the bag and transport it without a mess. This worked well for us until my kids were old enough to "hold it" until we got to a potty.

[Chester]

Hannah you are one brave (and crafty...a Maxipad, who would've thought!) Mama!

Kristin and MB, I do think I'm going to try a picture and some bells or something. I'm thinking I"m going to introduce it at home first, so he can learn that ringing the bells means serious business and a trip to the bathroom will occur. It's worth a try.

Laura, when I was buckling him into the car and he signed "toliet" I brought him back in the house and he did go. I've learned when it's a real potty sign and when it's a ploy to get out of something. There is a different urgency to the two of them. Stinker! He hasn't even been close to being dry at night yet. I don't think he's ready for that one yet. I'm okay with that, he'll get there.

Thanks All!
Dawn