Thanks and some questions

[faithhope]

Thanks for your joy over Noah. It is getting better, the fear is no longer outweighing the happiness.
OK now onto something simple. I have asked this before I think, but I will try to do it this time.
How do I put a picture under my name? you know when I post something and it has my username on the left, and most of you have cute pictures or cartoons. I want to put a pic of Noah.
And here goes one of my usual questions:
1. Do your kids have a more difficult temper than your typical kids?
We have a friend who is a special ed. teacher ( lives here in florida). We had dinner with her and she has been nice, but somethings she says bother me. She told us, "the one piece of advice coming from a teacher is get the temper under control right away."
This kind of scared me, like what do they all have bad tempers.
OK thanks for all your help as always my friends,
Jess

[ALLISA]

LOL....no not bad tempers.....

and I would tell your teacher-friend.......NEVER forget that each child is individual.....no clumping them all under one stereotype !!

I think rather than "bad tempers".....perhaps she meant....frustration levels ? and lack of social skills to learn how to control emotions and learn that NOT every emotion needs to be shouted from the rooftop.....hey.....not bad advice for ANYONE !!

There is, however a running joke that the "stubborn gene" can and will be discovered one day on the 21st chromosome !!

Keep enjoying that baby and never you mind about tempers.....before I have to lose mine ;D

[faithhope]

Thanks Allisa! I totally agree with not clumping anyone into one stereotype, it pisses me off. I am sorry to even ask that, I know it comes off sounding like I feel that way. To me Noah is just Noah. You made me feel much better, and as for that running joke, I love it. I myself am very stubborn, especially when I was a little girl, so I can't blame Noah's Ds! heehee

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

Stuborn here too and of corse Brooker takes after her mommy

I totally agree w/ Allisa. I couldn't have said it better myself

[Valerie]

Well, as far as tempers go, my older son had a far worse temper as a child than Nicholas. Nicholas RARELY cried as a baby, still hardly ever does. Doesn't really get mad and have fits like lots of kids do going through the toddler years.

I'll agree with the frustration comment though. I remember one time probably a year or so ago, Nicholas kept saying the same thing over and over and over, and I just could not get it. He started crying, which made me feel HORRIBLE, cause as I said, he rarely cries. I'm trying all kinds of things to make him happy, and finally he SIGNED and said, "ice cream." I remember thinking how sad is that, all he wanted was a little ice cream, and heck yes that would be frustrating to not be able to get the other person to understand what you want! He got a big old bowl of ice cream after I figured it out!

And as for the stubborn gene....YES!!! If he gets his mind set on something, it's pretty difficult to change it. For example, he had an eye appointment last Friday. Now in his defense, he had an ear infection...went to kindergarten round up that morning, then to the regular doctor, then to the pharmacy to get his medicine, then to his eye doctor appt. I did give him Tylenol before the appts, but by the time we got to the last one, he was absolutely done, didn't want to do anything, and there was just no getting him to cooperate. But he did beautifully with everything else up to that point. We're trying again today at 4pm. Wish us luck!

[damarasmom]

Well, I have to agree with everyone....Damara's temper isn't any more or less than her siblings. She is very stubborn at times, but not always, and can usually be "talked" out of it. She does get frustrated when she cannot relay what she wants verbally, but this is not her temper...

[momofrussell]

Yes, I'd have to say that this teacher is probably semantically using "temper" wrong and should be using "frusterated". Due to lack of communication skills this can happen. When people say stuff like this to you... just nod with a smile and say "uh huh"... LOL ;D

A.

[laurasmom]

Totally agree with the use of "frustrated". I know that Laura will sometimes need an explanation that is just to her, face to face, without a lot of extraneous noise and activity going on around her. She once had an art teacher at school that commented on Laura's temper, well, after observing, it wasn't Laura's temper, it was her frustration. This teacher would hold 3 different conversations on 3 different subjects all the while giving directions to kids. Laura was frustrated because she couldn't understand her.

And yes, beware of people that will lump our kids together. For some reason, that is a very common occurence.

Shaorn

[jelanismom]

Hi Jess,

Ok here's my way of thinking, Children with Ds are behaving at appropriate levels for children much younger...cognitive delays.

So with this in mind, lets picture a typical developing child that's 3 years old.... sometimes we see temper tandrums, outbursts of anger, all kinds of terrible stuff.

But if a child with Ds has a temper tandrums, people are so eager to label this child w/Ds as "angry" ...when infact they're displaying appropriate behavior for their developmental age. If it wasn't for the diagnosis " Ds" then the word "anger" probably wouldn't exist...replaced instead by "terrible two's" JMO

[Chris]

It's funny that you asked this question because I always say God gave me Sarah for a reason. I always think part of that reason is she rarely has meltdowns. She may get angry but it doesn't last long. The only time she is really difficult is when she has to get her toe nails clipped or have the doctor examine her. I think these are more sensory issues rather than just being angry.

She is stubborn. All her therapists have told me she is even more stubborn than most of the kids they have ever worked with. I don't know why most kids with Ds are stubborn but it does seem to be true. It may be that when kids with Ds are frustrated or don't understand, they become stubborn.

Sarah also fits part of the sterotypical Ds kid because she is a lovebug!

Chris

[Emilysmom]

Jessika,
I was immediately annoyed that this friend seemed to feel the need to throw in a negative stereotype at you. Why do people want to speak about kids with Ds in such generalities like that?? Of course, as you've seen here, there are some common things that many of us have dealt with (the recent discussion about dropping and flopping is one example), but even that is not an "across the board" similarity for kids with Ds. Unfortunately for her, your friend must have had some bad experiences with a child or two with Ds who exhibited frustrated behaviors. That's a shame, but it doesn't mean anything as far as Noah is concerned. BUT, maybe you can turn her negative experience into something positive for Noah. If he begins to develop any negative behaviors/habits, it's always wise to "get a handle on it" early. But, that's true for ANY child!! I'm with Adrienne.......just smile and nod and keep right on parenting Noah the way you feel is right!

[Jessie]

It's funny because we've talked about this before, that so many of our kids our stubborn. But, seems like the parent saying that also alludes to the fact that the child may also be inheriting that from the mom or dad. Jason is as stubborn as they come . . . but, he's very misunderstood . . . and his dad is wellllllll just a tad stubborn too.

I think that extra 21st chromosome enhances the stubborness they would have had anyway!! LOL


Jessie

[Connie]

I don't mean to sound flip but....

A synonym for stubborn is persevering....our kids persevere and over come a lot because of being stubborn. This is not necessarily a bad thing but....it can be annoying at times though.

Collin has no worse temper than my other boys but, he does have more frustation that comes out when he gets overwhelmed, can't be understood, or doesn't want to stop what he's doing.

Sorry I can't help you put a picture in because I have yet to learn how to do that!!!

Connie

[Connie]

I found this definition and liked it....

stub·born
adj. stub·born·er, stub·born·est


1. Unreasonably, often perversely unyielding; bullheaded.
2. Firmly resolved or [glow=red,2,300]determined[/glow]; resolute. See Synonyms at obstinate.
3. [glow=red,2,300]Characterized by perseverance; persistent[/glow]Connie

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

Ok let's see if I can explain this right. Do you use photobucket? If so thats good b/c that is all I know how to do

Go to photobucket
Copy the direct link (I think it's the second one)
Go to Uno
Go to your profile
Scan down to Avitar
Paste direct link to the avitar line
Under the avitar line it will ask size of pic or something like that
1st line 100
2nd line 100
It should show up when you go back to the board.

I sure hope this works for you. I sure wish I could see sweet little Noah everyday ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Let me know if I messed up in explaining. I haven't changed Brooks pic in sometime and i'm going by memory and it is shoddy at best LOLOLOL