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Post by jelanismom on Apr 30, 2008 23:53:57 GMT -5
I'm wondering about whether your kids throw things when they are mad and also when they're being silly.
I got a note in Jelani's Comm.book today that stated he was put in a "time out" for throwing toys. I haven't spoken to the teacher yet about this, I'm wondering if he was frustrated or being silly. I know when he's at home he'll sometimes, not always, get really silly and start throwing his toys and giggling. I don't put him in time out, should I? I've tried time-out for 3 minutes and he just hangs out and has fun, it's not really working. Any advice?
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Post by Chris too on May 1, 2008 7:12:47 GMT -5
Yep. This kid is not happy & is stressed out. Time-outs & any punishments are for persistant bad behavior or known bad behavior (the kid knows he is not supposed to do something really awful, like spit on someone). I think this is just another indicator of stress for your boy.
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Post by Ericsmomma on May 1, 2008 8:00:38 GMT -5
ditto on the throwing things....Eric loves to throw stuff BEHIND other things, like the TV cabinet, the outside fence, his bed...wherever its difficult to retrieve the dang things. I just take the things out of his hands as soon as I see him "lining up his aim", and then he doesn't get that object for awhile. I had recently bought him a small "ball pit" for his room, and he did good for a few days...now all he wants to do is throw the balls out, so balls are now GONE (for awhile). He may get them back later, but not if he throws them. And he does know that the balls stay in the pit because he does this at school and he loves it. (with no throwing).
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Post by steffipoo on May 1, 2008 9:01:24 GMT -5
Hey dawn.... I used to baby sit a thrower n a ponytail puller. He threw toys at school too. When he'd come to my house though it became problematic for Olivia cause she was usually the brunt of his throwing. And BTW the childs aim is amazing. lol. So thought n thought. Well everytime he would throw something that was not good to throw I would take him upstairs to the new throwing room. LOL I made a few assigned spots in the room where he could throw different stuff. At one point I made a huge part of the kids room a velcro wall aka david letterman. I gave him all sorts of choices of things that would stick to it to throw. We also would go outside and I'd let him hit the tee ball thingy but THAT was a bat idea even though the bat was plastic it was lethal..lol I made all sorts of throwing courses around our house. He never threw at Olivia again after he knew he could go to his spots and throw away. It took about 2 week for him to stop completely but they made one for the throwers at preschool after hearing of my babysitting progress. . Hey it worked. THEN LOL saw him again when him n Liv were attending sp ed kinder her first year of kinder at 4. LOL His mom was holding him Liv walked up to him said hi and he kicked her right in the face. Oh yea his mom 4got to tell me he stopped throwing but was a kicker now. OMG. Wanted to say well PUT HIM DOWN he's in kinder. Kicking my girl in the face. ((((HUGS))) Steff
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Post by jelanismom on May 1, 2008 9:39:00 GMT -5
thx Dolly, Chris, Steff...and omg Dolly, Jelani ALWAYS loves to toss things behind the bookshelf, under his bed- (behind -under -beside)...LOL, all the adjectives (or adverbs?) except not on-top. Steff, your ideas are great, and so sorry to hear about foot-in-face Now I have another throwing question...what do you all do if they are in a store... in the check out, or anywhere you walk and then they start grabbing stuff off shelves and throwing it? This just happened the other day, I thought it would be nice if mommy and Jelani had a walk-in hand-in-hand moment, w/o stroller... WRONG idea...he couldn't stop grabbing shelf items and flinging them. If he's in a stroller, it still happens. He has rubberband arms and can reach anything. Do you give a time out in store? That would be weird. And if you wait till your home, it's too late then. What to do???
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Post by twosomy21 on May 1, 2008 10:53:14 GMT -5
i would agree that he probably does not care for the class so much and is bored, you have said how the class is not really working out. who better to give you feedback than him. maybe throwing toys to be silly is misleading? anywho the market thing is interesting and kyle sat in the cart till about 6-7 (i only get this # from slight memory) and i thought he needs to walk and help me like a big boy so everytime we entered the store i layed down the law(?) and he knows to hold the side of the cart and that of course took practice. loren is still in the cart,i want to enjoy my freedom from runners for a bit.well loren woke upwith a dry diaper this morning i feel light headed, could it be true no more diapers? this is the tip of the iceburge but its a great start.i hope you find a good placement for your liitle guy
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Post by faithhope on May 1, 2008 14:13:16 GMT -5
Hey Dawn, I just wanted to send you a ((((BIG HUG))))). It sounds like you are having a hard time with poor Jelani lately. I wish I had some advice, but you are getting plenty good advice from our friends here. I just want you to know I am thinking of you and praying that you and Jelani together will figure things out so that he is not having such a hard time at school, it sounds like there is definitely stress with that situation. I remember when we moved and started a new school I hated it so bad my whole personality changed ( for the worst) and I just wanted out of there. I know of course Jelani is only 5. Love you, please keep us updated on the situation. Jess
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Post by jelanismom on May 1, 2008 14:22:31 GMT -5
thankyou Jessika you know, sometimes I worry that all this stuff I ask and tell about Jelani is discouraging for new mommies like you....but I see you do understand, it's his way of communicating "I don't like where I am". I have a meeting on the 15th to address placement. p.s. (((((hugs))))) right back...and little <<<hugs>>> for Noah! He's a picture perfect little doll, so glad you posted the pic! Now I need to go answer your question you posted, LOL I've been forgetting to! Dawn
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Post by Chris on May 1, 2008 18:01:22 GMT -5
Dawn, Sarah is a thrower and she also very good at it. She can hit just about anything she aims at, espcially our poor dog. I feel like we have tried everything but with no success. Her throwing has actually increased lately. She will take off her shoes and socks and throw them at my head while I am driving. She goes through phases of throwing at school, too. Her favorite is to take other kids lunches and toss them across the room. She also like to shake and dump their milk or juice. I wish I had an answer for both of us! Chris
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Post by jelanismom on May 1, 2008 18:40:08 GMT -5
omg Chris, here too! He hit me so hard one time in the head, that I almost had an accident So now, shoes are off till we get where we're going. Jelani has done like Sarah, and taken a whole tray of food and uplifted it into the air and there was food flying everywhere. This was at McDonalds, on the one visit in ions that we go. I had to apologize to the innocent bystanders, they were smiling and flicking frenchfries off their clothes, some were helping me, and Jelani was straight faced, totally w/o expression. I couldn't cause more of a scene and yell or scream, I usually just get a very sad face and yank him into a seat and tell him he was sooooo wrong, I try not to use the word "bad", but it's hard not to when he does such an awful thing. I say, no icecream and that gets the message across (it's his fave). He hasn't done this lately, it was 3 months ago, and I think maturity wise he's slowly getting a grip on what's acceptable and what's totally unacceptable. But he tests me never the less, just not as bad as at Micky D's There was a time that throwing his sippy cup was his all time favorite thing to do, he just couldn't set it down on the table in front of him...he would fling it across the room. The kid has a great arm! Now he sets it carefully down, and even makes sure I see him doing it right. Then I praise him, and he smiles. But there's still those times he'll fling his cup when we're out for a stroller ride. Luckilly its alot less often, and nobody has gotten hit in the process!
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Post by Claire on May 1, 2008 22:16:07 GMT -5
Adam has always loved throwings things, especially behind stuff too, like the wall unit and so on. He used to throw anyhting anytime got no reason. I personally think it started as a cause and effect thing.
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Post by victoriasdad on May 2, 2008 3:47:38 GMT -5
victoria rarely throws things when she is mad, she does throw things for fun, and omg does she have an arm,,lolol
btw way, did i tell you my daughter mariahs middle name is dawn,
well one of them her name is mariah mae kinkade dakota dawn davis,, i like to call her red
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Post by damarasmom on May 2, 2008 6:24:27 GMT -5
Victoriasdad...that is a very long name, there must be a story behind all those names. I will assume they are family names??
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Post by CC on May 2, 2008 21:47:01 GMT -5
OMG when Christopher was tiny YIKES he threw everything One of his favorite things to do was throw everything out of his room down the stairs and then he would go down the stairs and throw everything up the stairs We actually had to resort to taking everything out of his room and only had soft stuffed animals in there. Took a bit but he got over that, THANK God BUT Man on Man to this day he has a SUPER pitch of the ball and when he shoots hoops people are shocked at his aim. Must have been all the practice LOLOL My Chris never did this at school just at home. CC ~
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Post by victoriasdad on May 2, 2008 22:01:44 GMT -5
wife picked mariah mae is wifes cousin, kinkade is mothers maiden name,dakota is just pretty, and dawn is my bosses wifes name, i was covering all the bases
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