Ugh......

[laurasmom]

Vent, sort of. Probably.

At the end of last year, we knew Laura was going to the high school. Talked to the high school sped people, in transition, going to a more open program, more inclusion, etc., but everything not in place. Can we have her IEP right around school start time. Sure, I can understand that.

So, go to high school everyday for a few days before school started, to give Laura the lay of the land. This was last week. Talk to the sped dept. head. This is what we will do, here is Laura's schedule. Talk to another sped teacher, can Laura join her class 2 days a month for community service, sure that is great, I like the volunteering aspect. Talk to her "main" sped teacher, we will have to have her IEP, yes I know.

Anyway, school now in session for 4 days. Laura says she loves it. She has a locker for the first time ever, and has mastered the combination lock, thanks to a peer system they have set up. They assigned a peer, she has worked with Laura for 2 days, they called today to ask if that was okay. Well, of course it is.

Sped teacher surprised at her reading abilities. Well, I told him about her reading, guess he didn't believe Mom. She is in a class called Business Applications, included. Teacher told the sped teacher "I don't know what to do with Laura. I want her here, but what do I teach her". Sped teacher told me we would decide at her IEP what "you want her to do".

So, we have finally arrived at my vent. Yes, I can understand wanting the student and family input on education. But I am not a teacher, and I hate having teachers call me and say "I don't know what to do with her". I mean, until the IEP is held, how difficult is it to adapt something for Laura to do, to learn. And the sped teacher, come on, surely he can do something.

This is exactly why I wanted the IEP held before school started. I kept getting put off, for various reasons, why it couldn't be done. And now, her IEP is Sept. 3rd, so only another week before these decisions are made, but still, this should have been done before school so there are no phone calls saying "I don't know what to do with her". I hate hearing that line. It could be put differently, and sound nicer.

And I take blame for a great part of this, I should have put my foot down and demanded the IEP before school started, but, I didn't and now I could kick myself for it.

Lesson learned, once again.

Sharon

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

{{{{{{HUGS SHARON}}}}}} Well, Sept 3 is not that far away and then everything will be addressed

I agree, they could think of a nicer way to say that OR could be teachers and think up something for her to do just like the other kids. JMHO

[Kristin]

I know this is frustrating for you. I kept getting excuses as to why the school couldn't find an academic class for my then 4th grader to be included in once a day. I teach high school, and can tell you that from that perspective, the teacher is calling you because they truly do not understand how your daughter fits into their class. The teacher is trying to figure out how to fit Laura into the regular curriculum, and the answer may be "don't". Most of our regular classroom teachers attempt to teach our mainstreamed students the same curriculum as all of the students in the class, because that's all they've been taught to do. Teacher training rarely teaches them how to modify for students with special needs. Many effective teachers find a way to modify their system of evaluation and assignments for success. Most regular classroom teachers have little experience with how to truly work with students who are intellectually disabled in their classroom. Remember how much experience you had in raising a child with special needs?
We started school last week and I still don't have a list of my students who are RSP. Once that list comes out, I still won't have an idea what is in their IEP unless I go and specifically ask. (Which I do.) My question to the special ed coordinator is usually" what do I need to modify in order for the student to succeed"? Occasionally, students have been placed in my room purely for interaction with their peers. This places me in the position of needing to come up with something to keep the student busy, but I don't have any type of appropriate resources or materials, nor do I have any idea of what they are academically capable of doing! I'm glad you have a meeting next week. In addition to helping Laura, perhaps you can use your experience to help educate the rest of the professionals. I agree that your special ed teacher should have made some arrangements ahead of time with the teacher. A lesson for all of us transitioning to new schools, in particular, to plan ahead and schedule those IEPs earlier!
Let us know how things work out for Laura!

[momofrussell]

Welllll even if you don't have the IEP done before school, shame on the others for not thinking out of the box and adapting something for her. I wouldn't take all of this blame for not putting your foot down! Come on now... the gen ed teachers could go to the sped teachers and ask for help... you are right, it's NOT your job... and I'd politely remind them of that at the IEP meeting

I'd say "so, everytime there is a shift, change or new year it's going to be up to me to tell the school how to adapt curriculum to my daughter?" I think in this case you need to gently shove this back onto them. Encourage them to work as a team and meet daily, weekly, with support personal if needed so your daughter DOESN'T FAIL....it's not your job... it's not. Now, you working as a team is right on... and your input is invaluable... but again, it's not YOUR job and you should not have to wait until Sept 3rd...............

Good luck at the meeting!

A.

[laurasmom]

Thanks everyone. I can see both sides of the issue.

However, today I received another email from the business app's teacher. She again stated how sweet Laura was (I agree), and that she really didn't know what to do for her. I had already told her I couldn't get together before the IEP, and since there were only 4 school days before we meet, we would just wait until them.
She responded, told me she agreed, and that she would "keep Laura entertained until the IEP". What is she going to do, dance for her?

Of course, I that even though she chose the word "entertained", she is giving Laura work to do. Laura has told me what she is doing. I just don't think she understands yet what the choice of words is saying to a parent of a child with special needs.

Sharon

[momofrussell]

Hmmm sounds like you need to take the emails with you to the IEP just in case

A.

[ALLISA]

Aug 26, 2008 19:09:15 GMT -5 laurasmom said:

no phone calls saying "I don't know what to do with her". I hate hearing that line. It could be put differently, and sound nicer.

GGRRR....I totally agree....how about "what can I/we do to present this bettter to Laura"....not....." I don't know what to do with her"....ggrr....sorry you had to hear that.

I have a feeling that is "one of those comments" that unfortunately us parents hear once and awhile and they replay in our heads, coming back up when they should be long buried and forgotten.

Sorry for your frustrations....but I KNOW they are short-lived and you will have everyone on the right track shortly !