Bus Aide blow-up

[jelanismom]

I need your advice. Jelani takes the little yellow school bus every morning. We live 14 blocks from the school, but I like him to have the experience of riding the bus in the a.m., and then I pick him up after school.

Ok, this morning was a shocker because of what I witnessed and heard as I helped Jelani board the bus to the top step. The special ed bus driver has an aide who as you know assists children in boarding, getting seated, and buckling up. As the bus pulls up, I then help Jelani board the bus and no sooner than he's on board I hear a loud "STOP IT" a scream that could rattle windows! I look and there the aide was grabbing a child's legs as he lay flat out on his seat doing a "bicycle motion" and the aide screamed again, "he kicked me!!!" They were going at it. She then took my son's hand and left the kid laying there and seated my son. I waved goodbye and then felt sick. Is this appropriate for an aide to be doing? I understand that kids are challenging to control, but is outbursts of anger from a person employed as a bus aide acceptable? Losing your temper and physically snatching and screaming at this child? I shudder to imagine how she handles my own son if he acts up?

I have an IEP addendum meeting today in a few hours to address PT goals. The school special ed facilitator will be there too. Should I mention this incident? This aide is new on the route, the last aide was fired because a parent complained that she wasn't helping to board her child. If I complain then this will cost the aide her job, no doubt. Being a whistle blower is something I don't like to be, but in this incident, I am fearful of the aide's ability to control special needs children because of her anger I witnessed this morning! I'm about to take my son off the bus for this reason, but I wanted your advice first. Thankyou in advance for whatever advice you give!

[twosomy21]

i would say something only because your son rides , and even if you had witnessed this as a passer by(no affiliation with this community) it looks bad and it is ,i think the mom might like to know. and you are correct in your thinking about what happens if j gets out of hand.
i have not really had issues with the bus-only time frames,but i would tolerate that before a lashing out adult aid. good luck and poor J was probably like o.k, good morning

[CC]

Sorry I am late on this, sounds like you already had your IEP BUT YES I would bring this up.

We too had a bus problem in the first of the school year and another parent and myself spoke up and it was nipped in the bud.

I say speak up pronto and end this.

Our kids need us to speak up for them when they can't.

Just my thoughts

CC ~

[ALLISA]

YES YES YES say something to MANY people.....IEP meeting, bus company, school principal, the parents of ALL the children.....that is HORRIBLE !!

there is no reason for it.....

[ALLISA]

AND.....if she had NO QUALMS doing that in front of a PARENT.....do you even want to imagine what she does ALONE

To not even be embarassed or apologetic....

I am sick now......

And here I was VERY seriously thinking of putting Erin on the bus.....hers is about 16 miles away....20-30 minute drive.....and I haven't put her on for this fear.....she can't communicate with me....but I NEED my 2 hours a day back !!

Anyways....not meaning to steal the thread....

Please post an update !!

[damarasmom]

Well, I am with the view point of SAY SOMETHING! We had an issue with the aide on the bus in the mornings. I told the school, teacher AND the supervisor of the Bus company. Damara does not take the morning bus because of this woman, but does take the afternoon bus. I would have felt very guilty if something happened and I didn't share what I experienced.
TELL< TELL<TELL!
Of course you will be known as the tattle tale, but...Whatever, I am too! I need a buddy in my corner. teehee

[jelanismom]

I called to the district, and spoke to the special ed coord., and faxed this letter yesterday. Next it's the bus co.





My son Jelani takes the school bus Lawndale 3 every morning. We live 14 blocks from the school, but I like him to have the experience of riding the bus in the a.m., and then I pick him up after school. His bus driver is Grace and she such a kind person every day.

But this morning was a shocker because of what I witnessed and heard. As the bus pulls up, I then help Jelani board the bus and no sooner than he's on board I hear a loud "STOP IT" a scream that could rattle windows! I look and there I see the aide Terry grabbing the student whose name is Joel by his legs as he lay flat out on his seat doing a "bicycle motion" and the aide screamed again, "HE KICKED ME!!!" They were going at it. She then took my son's hand and left Joel laying there and proceeded to seat my son. I waved goodbye and then felt sick.

Is this appropriate for an aide to be doing? I understand that kids are challenging to control, but are outbursts of anger acceptable from a person employed as a bus aide for special needs children? I don't believe it is appropriate for an aide to lose her temper and scream and forcefully snatch children. I shudder to imagine how she handles my own son if he acts up.

As I understand, this aide is new on the route, and the last aide was fired because a parent complained that she wasn't helping to board her child. I absolutely loved Marissa and she was kind and very helpful every day. Being a whistle blower isn’t something I like to be, but in this incident I saw and heard today, I am fearful of Terry's ability to assist special needs children because of her anger! The screaming and the forceful handling was just simply wrong. I'm about to take my son off the bus for this aide’s shocking behavior towards Joel. I can't imagine what goes on that I don't see. It's too sad to imagine.

So am I guess I'm in your corner now Shirley? (wink) At least I feel better telling. This is the cold hard world and there's things I don't see or know about but I can't control those things. What I can control is what I do see and there's no way I was letting this abuse go unnannounced. thanks guys. scarey huh?

[Valerie]

Good for you for saying something! This is something that I haven't ever had to deal with. That I know of, anyway. It is one of my fears, since Nicholas is not so great with communication skills, that something may happen and he won't be able to tell me about it. So yes, good for you for standing up for ALL the kids on that bus who would potentially be put in that same situation!

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

Did you tell the other mom what happened? Joel's mom? I would!! Good for you Dawn for speaking up. This is another reason Brook will NEVER ride the bus. I'm to overprotective and paranoid.

Here's a quick story. My little sister has a BFF who our family has known for 20 yrs. I love her just like another sister. She just happens to be my tattoo artist as well. She has done 12 out of the 15 tat's I have. I love her and her two girls. Her hubby is another story Anyway, after me having Brook and her being dismissed from Target, she decided to become a bus driver. Yep the Sepc Needs bus. (covered in tat's and all ) I feel good for the kids who ride her bus. She is kind and thoughtful. I wish all Spec Needs bus drivers were like her Now, Brook would ride her bus but were not in that school district Moral of the story: Good drivers are out there. Hopefully your school can find a good aide for the driver

[cindylou]

I think you absolutely did the right thing--and if I were you I would try to get a word to Joel's mom. Please post the districts reply--and if they don't give you a reply--send your letter again and ask how the situation has been resolved as you have concern in putting your child on the bus...

just my opinion!
Cindy

[Chris too]

Wow. I'm so glad that Stevie's bus drivers are top-notch. They adore the kids & are so gentle & sweet. They need no aid, and they have restraints to use for kids that are "challenging to handle" which buckle out of the child's reach & from which Houdini could not escape To use those restraints they need parental sanction. Stevie just gets the standard child restraints bc she only unbuckles when the vehicle is both stopped & people are exiting - which could become a problem for the coming-home bus if she ever survives the trip w/o sleeping

[lespring]

Absolutely saying something was the right thing to do! Remember when Angela was assaulted by a staff member last year? Right in front of an entire class full of students?

[lorraine]

I think you have done the right thing and also like others say you should try and tell Joel's parents, I would hate for something like that to happen to one of mine and not know about it.

Lorraine

[damarasmom]

Dawn....GOOD FOR YOU! So glad to hear that you stood up and shouted! I loved the letter, very well written and I'm sure this will get a response. You are totally in my corner and there is noone better I would like to have there with me! You go girl!!!
We gotta keep our eyes peeled and our mouths open to speak.