Mom VS Doctor Tami [Vent]

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

That is exactally what it felt like today Or maybe it should be Doc Tami VS mommy either way Brook left hysterical b/c we couldn't get any blood for her tests even though I had her hydrated and also b/c she is 2 now and doing EVERY terrible two trick out there

Mommy left crying b/c Doc was either having a bad day or something but I walked away w/ everything Brook does or doesn't do IS MY FAULT!! Oh yea, what a lovely day

Why doesn't Brook take off her own clothes? I won't let her or she'd run around nekid.
Why isn't she walking by herself? She walks just fine holding on to one of my hands.
Why doesn't she sleep through the night? And what is she doing still sleeping with you? ARGGGGG.... I don't know why she doesn't sleep through the night and she sleeps w/ me b/c at the end of a 14 hr work day I have no energy to argue w/ her and she loves her mommy and that is just the way it is!!!!
Why isn't she in daycare/playgroup? No daycare b/c she comes to work w/ me and the age appropiate play group in town is scared she will get "run over" by the other kids b/c she can't do what they do and the Ds play groups, which there are only two I have found are 45 & 60 miles away once a month. You paying for the gas?
Why doesn't she have ST? I explained what you all already know.
Blah, blah, blah, blah on and on she went. I felt like CRAP!!! On the way back to work she had cried herself to sleep and hubby asked why I was crying and I said the above and more and then he gets ps'd. What a day!! Brook and I slept for 3 hours ;D Got up, had some dinner and now were going to go watch some Signing Time and rest. Hopefully doc was just having a bad day b/c I really do like this doc. The only one Brook has ever had but if this is going to continue, i'm done!

Sorry I just had to get this out. Thx for listining

[Kristin]

There are days I feel the same. I had a sleepless night the other night worrying if I was working on reading and math enough with her at home. After that I was thinking about the latest behavior issues, and then I began to panic as she's beginning to notice differences between boys and girls...puberty is just around the corner and I haven't any idea where to start. I think you do what you do to get through the day as best as you can, and pick your battles with your daughter. Most of us here are "supermoms" and with that comes the burden that we put on ourselves, or others put on us to solve all problems. The doctor is not living with a child who has special needs, and does not know that the things she is asking aren't always that simple. Perhaps you might choose one of her requests to work on...find the one easiest for you or most important and let the rest go for now.

[damarasmom]

What a bummer that the Dr. made you feel like that. That's not cool...It seems to me that you are doing a great job with her, and I cannot believe she would think that being so negative would be productive. She should have been concentrating on giving you helpful tips on each item to help Brook improve, not make her mommy feel bad.
I totally understand the whole blood drawing thing. We have had such issue with this for years. BUT....our doctor gaves us a RX for a cream that numbs the area. We put it on about 1 hour before the blood draw and it really does help...we just need to keep Damara from watching the needle...You may want to check on this. We use it EVERY time she goes for blood work, we put on both arms since we don't know which one they will use!

[sandi]

Wow, sounds like you had a rough one for sure. Gee, thats sad. I do hope you have better days with your doc because it will be no fun having to see your doc again and have that kind of a day. Am thinking about you and hope all goes well next time. Its good to vent, we are all here to vent to one another. Its best to write it out like this and get it off your chest, even though most of it is still there. Good luck for next time. Hugs

[steffaroni]

Hey I am sooo sorry that happened to you both. BTW I'd CALL the doctor Tami and ask her to PLEEZ write a prescription for ST perhaps it will help in your quest to get Brookie ST. Sounds like your doc needs a class in bedside manner. (((HUGS))) Steff

[jelanismom]

Why doesn't Brook take off her own clothes?

because it requires practice and it's a skill that take chikdren with Ds a bit longer to achieve..(dumb doc you should know this)

Why isn't she walking by herself?

good question...my son didn't walk by himself till he turned 4...and still has low tone and walks holding my hand alot..., but independent walking is another milestone that takes longer to achieve (dumb doc you should know this)

Why doesn't she sleep through the night?

because it's proven whether it's a child with Ds or just a typical 2 year old, that children have sleep disturbances, esp. children w/Ds...there's proven facts that exist in research. (dumb doc you should know this)

And what is she doing still sleeping with you?

because she is. And if you want to argue with me doc, then at least wait till she's older than 2....no damage being done just yet sleeping with mom. (dumb doc)

I think if you could find a developmental pediatrician, or at least like Steff said "one with a nicer bedside manner" than it would be helpful...I know it's tough finding one....I'm still looking. The questions the doc raised were fine, it's how she went about asking...with a condiscending tone in her voice I bet. Half the time I have to take the docs to school on things related to Ds.
Hope you're feeling better Jenn. If you want, I'll go smack that doc for you...I can't see how you still like her. I already don't like the (*&@^&*^%$) and I've not met her.

(((hugs)))
Dawn

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

I know Dawn. I have not been back for Brooks blood draws either. Bad momma!!

[Chris too]

Just a bit of perspective on doctors: they are human. They have bad days & bad years. Our pediatrician once had a very bad year. He quit interacting in a friendly way with my kids, seemed to miss rather obvious steps in care, just wasn't "all there" if you know what I mean. Then rather suddenly, he was back to himself again. He is a great doctor, but I was ready to switch because of that year & now I'm glad that I delayed. He was the one who told me about Stevie's probable Ds (I had suspected), and he did so with such gentleness & hopefulness that I still tear up when I think of his words. He has been a team player in the parent-child-doctors decision-making pool & never questions my parenting - except that one year. Now he says "Well, obviously, you know how to parent."

Maybe Dr. Tami is having a bad year. I had planned on talking to Dr. Jones prior to switching just to let him know that he was slipping - out of concern for a good man & a great doctor gone off the path. Perhaps you should try to do that with your doc. Or just write her a letter.

I'm sorry that I missed this when you most needed {{{hugs}}}

[Googsmom aka Jennifer]

Awww Chris {{{{HUGS}}}} right back atcha'. I'll take Brook in next week for her blood draws. Maybe she'll be in a better mood. But first I have to go camping w/ all the kids and the dog.