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Post by faithhope on Apr 2, 2008 15:24:57 GMT -5
Hi Everyone! I sure missed you all. I feel like I have not been on for weeks. We moved from California to Florida on the 26th, we flew from Palmdale, Ca airport to S.F. airport then to Denver then to Tampa. Noah was a perfect angel. Didn't cry once. It worked out good that we had so many stops, to give us chance to walk around and get a break. I really miss my family, especially my mom. It is funny how the grass is always greener. When we were living in Ca. all I wanted to do was move to Fl. so that we could finally buy our own home, get our own life started as a family. Of course my heart changed a little once Noah was born and he had Ds. Ever since then life has changed for me, sadly I don't get excited about really much. I know I just have to get used to things, and being so far from my family makes it even harder. WE are not going to buy a home right away, till we are sure we really want to stay here for at least 2 years. Also since the market is still dropping alot here. I think I am a little depressed again. Plus reality is setting in. I now have to start thinking about Noah's future as far as programs. Maybe once I get started with that and I have some real guidance it will not seem so scary and depressing. HOpe I am not rambling too much and not making sense. Please pray that I find my way, for Noah's sake as well as my own. Another thing is we are staying with my mom in law, I love her to death, but she talks about the other grandchild and it just depresses me becuase I can't help but compare. KWIM. Here is another thing that happens alot. People always want to see the baby you know how it is. Wherever you go with a baby people are curious. Most of the time, they see him and they say oh how old is he? What's his name? Then they say cute to his name, but rarely do they just say Oh he is cute. I know this probably sounds crazy. It makes me wonder what they think of him already at only 3 months, do they see the Ds? Or do they just see something different? If so this is just the beggining and it hurts me. OK enough from me, just needing to get things off my chest. Love, Jess Much more later.
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Post by momofrussell on Apr 2, 2008 16:04:17 GMT -5
HOWDY... and welcome to FL!!!! You know..... along with having a new baby.. and one with spec needs.. you just moved so that is another rite of passage...give yourself time to get adjusted and don't try to save the world all today Your reality should only being enjoying your son who is your baby... don't worry about planning the next 30 yrs out for him.. I don't even do that with my typical girls! You will be JUST fine. I just called one of by bestest friends I met online.. she lives farther down in Fort Lauderdale but I did ask her to help me find where you would go for support and to get the help you need for Noah. I will get back to you on that. As far as the comments and people wanting to see your baby, think of Noah as JUST a baby when they are doing this and remember... some people will gush.. some won't.. some will ask questions.. some won't.. and more then likely.. the DS will have NOTHING to do with it. If it does come up.. then talk about it then... but try not to worry or think about it too much and think it always is the DS...we tend to get so consumed now that we are in this world of DS... but more times then not...it really isn't about the DS.. we just think it is I wish I could come there and give you a big hug and hang out! Sounds like you need just some time to "hang out" and not think Wish we could help you get settled! HUGS!!!! A.
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Post by ALLISA on Apr 2, 2008 16:21:14 GMT -5
I think I am a little depressed again. Plus reality is setting in. Please pray that I find my way, for Noah's sake as well as my own. It makes me wonder what they think of him already at only 3 months, do they see the Ds? Or do they just see something different? Okay....I took a few quotes that I wanted to respond to...... First .....whhewwww on the move.....glad you made it and all is well ....moving itself can be stressful !! I will "pray that you find your way"....but as I have made (probably annoyingly clear at this point ).....do NOT hesitate to speak with a doctor about your depression and your feelings. You are post-partum so your hormones are flying all over the place and trying to return to normal and on top of that upheaval in your body you have learned shocking news about your baby and moved across the country & living with inlaws !! There is NO shame in asking for some help to regulate your body when you need it. I wanted to comment on the stranger's peeking at your baby....I know EXACTLY how you feel......it was a HUGE question for me, too.....do they know ? Can they tell ? Are they wondering ? Are they too polite to ask ? Should I inform ? so so many thoughts would fly through my head,....and now 8 years later looking back....I realize it was because I was so raw still and so stung by the news that it was ALL I thought about ......now she is just Erin....of course people know she has DS !! LOL and why did I think I had to explain her to anyone ?? LMAO.....i'm gonna search the old board....because I REMEMBER coming here to ask how eveyone handled the "meeting of strangers"....it was a very big deal for me.....now ....I say who the heck cares ?? Just you wait for the first time you get another mom ( with a child with DS) approach you.....you'll know.....just by seeing her face when she sees your Noah.....and you'll feel like you are in a secret club !! I've had so many people stop to show me pics of their sons, daughters, grandchildren etc with DS......love it !! My # 1 favorite stranger approach happened one day at Children's hospital.....right before her heart surgery and I was incredibly down that day.....just overwhelmed with everything.....and a woman ( or angel who knows ?) stopped to ooh and aaah over Erin.....when all of a sudden......she gasped and said " Does she have DS"......I wasn't quite sure where this conversation was gonna go.....she sounded shocked and surprised and I said " yes, she does"....and she hugged me & told me how lucky I was and said she was on a waiting list to adopt a child with DS.....well.....you could have knocked me over with a feather......she was just what I needed.....and I hope you meet someone like her.....sounds like you need it, too !! Gotta run...type more later !!
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Post by Chris too on Apr 2, 2008 16:59:43 GMT -5
Congratulations on a successful move! It won't be long before you have new friends, Noah is getting his services, and you are beginning to feel "at home" in FL. Go have a look at the beach - that might help. The sea-side always makes me go "ahhh!" and it sounds like you need a few "ahhhs" to get you back to being you.
I'm praying for you, and I look forward to your next few posts that will remind us of your "springy-ness" - you bounced back with zeal at the last change (knowing the dx).
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Post by Valerie on Apr 2, 2008 17:57:31 GMT -5
Glad you safely made it to Florida! Sounds like you have a lot of big stuff going on in your life right now. I know it's easy for someone else to say this, but just give it time, things will all settle into place. Just go one day at a time and enjoy the good stuff!
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Post by Googsmom aka Jennifer on Apr 2, 2008 18:35:54 GMT -5
Glad you made it Just hang out w/ mom in law and check out your surroundings. Chris has a super idea, go to the beach Do you still have the #'s I gave you before the move. When you feel like it give em' a call. They might even have some info on maybe a counsler for you. Just someone to talk to besides us of corse, that has knowledge of Ds and babies and new mommy stuff. Everyone has already gave you great advise so I will leave you w/ what you asked me for: How's that? Luv ya Jess.................. ~Jenn and Brook~
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Post by Emilysmom on Apr 2, 2008 18:45:13 GMT -5
Jessika, I'm so glad you made it safely to Florida and that Noah was an angel for the trip!
Have you ever seen that thing that describes all the stressful life events in order of how stressful they are to us? It's like there is a number attached to that event, and I think you add them all up and get a score for how much stress you might be under at the present time. Well, moving is WAY on up there as a cause of stress. (and I think that moving as far across the US as possible must add a lot to the stress level) And........having a baby is way on up there too!! And, I don't remember about having a baby with Ds, but I just KNOW that has to increase the stress level. Buying a house is huge too........so, lol maybe it's a good thing you're going to put that one off for a bit. (Although I'm not sure how living with a mother-in-law would rate.....probably pretty high!)
Anyway........My point in all of that is that you are going through a LOT of stressful things all at once. Give yourself some time. As we've said before, take one day at a time.
About comments made by people about Noah. Please try not to read too much into their comments. You can cause a lot of un-needed worry and sadness for yourself and truth is...........you really have NO idea what they are thinking. WE at Uno Mas think Noah is BEAUTIFUL, and we are certifiably the BEST judges EVER!!!!! So, believe US and tell yourself every single day "I am the mother of one AWESOME, adorable little guy"!!!!!
Susan
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Post by tiffany on Apr 2, 2008 18:50:31 GMT -5
I am glad to hear you are safe and sound in Florida!! Keep your chin up, you have a lot going on right now! Just relax and enjoy the sunshine. Things will settle down soon. Then you can move ahead and deal with whatever comes your way! Love and prayers to you, Tiffany
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Post by jelanismom on Apr 2, 2008 19:53:15 GMT -5
Glad your move went well and Noah was a good boy I know what a big move this is and now you're finally there so take time to get comfortable...what part of Fla are you in? I lived there back when I was 3- Cape Kennedy I think. I know it's hard to adjust when you miss your mom...but just think positive and stay sweet as you are, it'll all work out. Sending (((hugs))) and if I could just squeeeeeze little Noah I would! So I'll blow him a kiss instead ~ ~ Take care and take all the good advice here, I'm happy you made it safely. Maybe post pics when you can !!! Dawn
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Post by CC on Apr 2, 2008 22:39:48 GMT -5
"HOpe I am not rambling too much and not making sense" You are NOT rambling and making LOTS of sense. You have had LOTS going on in a very short period of time. Take the time to breathe and smell the roses. Everything will work out in all due time. I know lots easier for me to say but it will, I promise you that HUGS CC ~
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Post by damarasmom on Apr 2, 2008 22:51:07 GMT -5
I am so happy to finally hear from you and know that you all got there safely! YEAH...I can understand your sadness, however, give yourself some time, you have just experienced alot within the past few months and you have not had time to deal with it all! Also, please know that asking for help from a professional is NOT a sign of weakness! ASK....I had depression after birth and needed some help too, and it's all hormones!! Worth looking into... Can't wait to see updated photos of your beauty! Keep in touch with us!!
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Post by Jackie on Apr 3, 2008 1:00:32 GMT -5
Glad to hear you have made your move. Soooo many changes in your life all at once...it has to be hard. I think as someone above me here has suggested...it is time for you to seek out a support group and meet other moms...you will be amazed at how your life will change. I waited about 6 weeks and then sort of "fell' into a support group...and ...wow...it made ALL the difference. We can probably help you find the closest one if you can't. So I hope you don't wait toooo long. Other moms will also be a wonderful help in choosing programs. I wish I knew more about Florida but I don't...just what I see on CSI...and have never been to Disney World either... ;D
Thinking of you
Jackie
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Post by Deborah on Apr 3, 2008 6:26:19 GMT -5
Glad to hear you arrived safely. Now that you are closer we should plan a get together in the future.
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Post by Myria on Apr 3, 2008 8:15:51 GMT -5
I'm glad you made it safely, and that Noah was a perfect baby for you I agree completley with the beach suggestion, I drove up the coast today and just listening to the waves crashing on the beach is so relaxing! Take care, Ayden sends his "Auntie Jess" a big wet kiss
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Post by twosomy21 on Apr 3, 2008 14:23:12 GMT -5
glad to hear your there!your right. the sevices will make you feel more comfortable, as for mil she will always talk about the grandkids,and hopefully she will talk about noah in the same loving,posative way. your fortunate .good luck
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