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Post by Kristen on Feb 24, 2005 11:57:24 GMT -5
I am not a fan of anything that puts anyone on a "scale". I understand the necessity for it, but I think too many people look at pepaers and not people. If they are able to use it as ONE FACTOR in consideration to srpingboard a conversation, fine by me. I fthey make a person a number, that is the easy way out and defeating the purpose and that happens all too often.
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Post by Kristen on May 21, 2005 19:33:21 GMT -5
I really don't think there was ulterior motive here. That being said, if I hear one more person talk about how loving people iwth disabilities are (esp. DS) andhow they hug everyone all the time...I said from the get go that there is no way in heck that my child will become a random person hugger and he will learn socially acceptable limits because it is not cute to me whatsoever. If I were in your shoes, I would take this as an opportunity to reinforce appropriate vs. inappropriate displays of affection and leave it at that.
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Post by Kristen on Feb 22, 2005 19:44:52 GMT -5
That's amazing! I can tell you one story after another how NOT alone we are. So many people have so many things they are delaing with in relation to their kids. I think of how in those first days I would walk mindlessly through the store looking at them thinking they don't even know how good they have it. How lucky not to be fearful and scared and full of so many conflicting emotions. I am learning that as we go on you can't tell who we are by looking at the smiles on our faces and pride in our eyes, but we are out there. Sometimes I wonder if anyone has thought that of me.
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Post by Kristen on Feb 22, 2005 19:46:23 GMT -5
OMG poor kid! That went through the house here last year and it was awful! Thank goodness he is drinking!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 23, 2005 13:29:04 GMT -5
I just saw this - hope she is doing even beter today than yesterday! Thsoe sinuses can realy hurt!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 23, 2005 13:43:43 GMT -5
WTG!!! Maybe she likes people standing on their heads right now. No problem - you just have to hang her pics upside down on the fridge!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 22, 2005 18:03:28 GMT -5
OMG Chris - that is what I kept saying - what is no one loves him besides us? Talking #1 biggest fear when we first heard the dx. What a goof I was.
Truth of the matter is that even when I was preggo with Carter I recieved an unusually high amount of attention when I went out. I thought it was really strange and when I was preggo with Syd I didn't get near as many comments, so it wasn't just a preggo thing. The kid has a life force like no other, let me tell ya! Now, forget it, I CAN'T go somewhere for a few minutes. I have actually left him at home to run in and out of the store because of it. He can just be sitting there and people seem to flock some days.
Just recently, a little old grandma walked right past my dh who had Syddie in his cart over to us and looked at Carter and said it's an angel! Then she leaned over and said you know, in y day no one would have given him a chance. Look what they missed out on. I am so glad it's different now. Babies touch lives. We are lucky enough to be reminded when they are special.
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Post by Kristen on May 20, 2005 10:41:55 GMT -5
All I am going to say is what the you know what is wrong with some people? I am glad it ended well, but come on! What has this world come to?
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Post by Kristen on May 26, 2005 12:13:52 GMT -5
I agree wtih A - we need to know the differences so we have the right options and possibilities in front of us. Otherwise it's like running a marathon only to be told gee, you didn't ever really qualify since you didn't fill out this piece of paper...sorry! The journey may end up beign the same, but the outcome is different.
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Post by Kristen on May 20, 2005 10:45:24 GMT -5
There was a cotroversey here last year and that come up. I didn't know that before, but I totally filed it in my mental rolodex for later - as in things that will be examined and discussed AT LENGTH when my guy is older. I think too few people know there is a difference. Good point to bring it up!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 10, 2005 12:16:18 GMT -5
That's adorable! Somewhere along the line Carter has learned to cover his mouth when he coughs and will even stop mid crawl and cough into his hand or the crook of his arm. I love it! He doesn't burp much, but he did just this week and covered that, too, then pated himself on the chest - I do that when I burp! It's amazing what little sponges they are. You never know what goes in until it comes out!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 8, 2005 13:04:32 GMT -5
Haven't noticed it, but my cousin's son, who is 5 1/2 and typical, says these weird things sometimes that he would have no way of knowign and when they questin him, her referes to "MeeMaw" which is what his great grandmother was called (my grandma's sister). For example, his grandmother has an ankle she hurt before he was born. She was talking about she couldn't play with him because her ankle hurt one day and he said I remember when that happened. She was like oh really, tell me. He described her driving to work and snow and ice and it was dark and she parked in this certain spot and she didn't see the ice and she fell. She was shocked to say the least. She said how do you know all that and he said that happened when me and meemaw were watching you from heaven. I don't know, I think there might be something to it all and I think it's wonderful! Whenever one fo the kids starts laughing at nothing my best friend's mom says look, they're playing iwht the angels!
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Post by Kristen on Feb 8, 2005 12:57:56 GMT -5
I personally get tired of it. Pick yourselves up, yes, I sid that. Carter has a disability woo-hoo. Most days I feel like this and it could phase me as much as knowing the news will be back on at 6, KWIM? Other days, especially when he is on the brink of a next milestone (walking, now) and he's trying then he isn't making it then it's like he doesn't feel like trying today but maybe tomorrow - then it gets stressful. I think the knowledge that he is not like every other kid and we don't know what to do for him makes it a heightened stress. There seems to be more of a sense of urgency sometimes. Does that make sense? I think of him as any other kid in the way that I love him like I would love him if he did not have DS. I love him and Syddie the same. I don't think of him as any other kid in that well, he is obviously not. I think I don't make a point of that much because I would rather people act like it is no big deal (which it is and isn't) than be reminded that he isn't. Better to steer towards acceptance, KWIM? everyone doesn't need to know some days are harder than others.
As for the general public - I could give a rat's hiney. I get that same look or I get asked if the kids are twins a lot and I say no and they look so shocked. Or I get teh overly nice attentive person in the store and I think here we go again. In sum, I have my DS awareness ribbon proudly displayed on my car. If people have questions, I answer them; when they have sincere supportive words, I genuinely thank them. I am 100% NOT ashamed that Carter is diferent and I am 100% proud of him. Saying he has DS does not diminish NOR uplift his accomplishments "in spite of". Don't give him more credit than he deserves, but don't stereotype him, either.
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Post by Kristen on Feb 7, 2005 10:41:01 GMT -5
I am so sorry for your loss and grief. I am glad that he had a wonderful life - that is important! Your mother must be besides herself. I can only imagine what it is like to lose a child. There can't be anything harder. Thank you for sharing with us! Let us know how you're doing now and then!
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Post by Kristen on May 17, 2005 21:00:24 GMT -5
All very relevant to all kids (except the last one). That one is my fave though. I met someone who said they only discipline their child within the constraints of their disability. I said oh. I discipline with in the constraints of my expectations and tweak the delivery of it until he gets it. He looked at me like I was nuts.
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